What is his deal?

So, recently I have been seeing this guy I work with. We are not dating seriously, but when we go out with friends, it is guranteed we will go home together. However, before any of this ever happend he said he didn't want to hurt me, However, I think he is the one guarding his feelings. Well, in recent months he's called more, texted me more etc. However (because I am in the process of moving out of my bf's place) he has been a little distant. He did text me the other night, but I am not sure if he's that interested. But people that I work with tell me that when we're together he seems so happy and that when we go out and I start talking to other guys, he gives the guys dirty looks, and watches over me. Also, he started being more affectionate, even though he doesn't want anyone we work with to know about us (even tho they all see it.) So, does he like me? Should I just give him space to let him think a little? What's his deal?

13 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    This guy is using u, unless he asked u out, you're just a side -dish.

  • 1 decade ago

    I think this guy is being very respectful to you. I believe it's protecting your feelings while you are going through your ordeal with moving out of your boyfriend's house. He's mature enough to know to stay away and not get emotionally involved with someone who is taken. I think he does like you. Sure, he spends time with you. And sure, he protects you and is starting to get a little bit more affectionate. He's taking it slow and making sure all the conflicts are solved first.

    Also, being that he works with you, it's never a smart idea to date someone you work with. However, he can't avoid his feelings. He's willing to make it public that two co-workers are "seeing each other", but he's taking careful steps.

    I think you should give him the same respect he's given you. Don't be distant but don't be aggressive either. Let him know that you're there. You don't have to come out and say, "I want to jump your bones." There are always other ways to say that you are interested in him. For example, the next time you are together (public or privately), when he makes a funny comment, say, "You are so funny. I like spending time with you." This comment is very innocent and doesn't imply anything. However, this small, yet powerful statement will clue him in that you are interested. Oh, by the way, when making this statement, make sure there's physical contact. Grab him arm when you say it. Put your arm around him when you say it. Those are innocent moves, but yet will get the point across.

    Right now, you are "friends". But friends can become more. Just don't rush into anything. A disaster relationship with a co-worker can make the career a living hell.

  • 1 decade ago

    I think the question is... What is your deal? Why haven't you invited him to a place he can't easily escape from; which shouldn't be so hard since ya'll are intimate, and talk to him. Keep it casual no pressure from reading your letter you have no problem expressing yourself. Find out what each of you want. Come to a compromise and actively steer the relationship in that direction; together.

  • 1 decade ago

    I think he is confused he probably likes you then there's times when he doesn't want to be hurt so he just plays it cool and while he is "playing it cool" he probably thinks hay i really like this girl why am i doing this to here or i know how it feels to be hurt by some one i love what am i doing. I think you should leave him alone for a while but don't break up with him because if he wants you he will come back if you break up with him he will think oh well i guess she did not want me so i wont beg her to come back. Just slowly drift away if he wants you he wont let you drift completely away. He probably just doesn't know what you want. because if he just come off real strong you'll think he is a stalker if he does not come strong enough you'll think he doesn't want you.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Yeah he likes you allright. But becareful, he seems possesive. I mean becareful afterwards when you're together, you might not have much freedom. Like when you talk to other guys on the phone, meet other guys for lunch even tho its colleges or exclassmates, he might not like it. I think not only he has to consider, you also have to. you know, once you get something you want really bad, you have different feelings for it.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    It sounds like he likes you. Being that you are still living at your ex's you aren't giving him a lot of options at this point. When you move out and he knows it, maybe things will move forward...until then he probably doesn't know what he is supposed to do.

  • 1 decade ago

    u got to let him have some space then he will be crawling all over u.then u should make him jealous so he could tell u how he feels if he doesn't just ask him straight up girl OK if he say sum thing then tell him how u feel.

  • 1 decade ago

    The problem is that you are still living with your boyfriend!! He is feeling insecure and is probably thinking is you are girlfriend material; like would you do this to him kind of thing.

  • 1 decade ago

    yes, he likes you. whether he wants to commit or get serious or not, he is still male and they have serious imbedded territory issues! thats why he gives looks and watches you. he has (in his mind) staked his claim and everyone else should just back off.

  • 1 decade ago

    He likes you, he's just waiting for your boyfriend to get out of the picture.

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