Please review my poem. I need constructive criticism?

Title: You Were The One Written by a 14 year old girl Once upon a time, I believed in love I believed in happiness and trust I believed that no one would ever break my heart Until you came along Until you walked into my life I gave you my trust freely And you used it to get the best of... show more Title: You Were The One
Written by a 14 year old girl

Once upon a time, I believed in love

I believed in happiness and trust

I believed that no one would ever break my heart

Until you came along

Until you walked into my life

I gave you my trust freely

And you used it to get the best of me

And as I sat there, I had no idea

That you would soon grab a hold of my heart

And tear it in half and shred it to peices

And as you destroyed me

I watched as you went to her

And I watched as you both held hands

And I saw as you both smiled

Together

And then I realized

That you were the one

You were the one who walked me through life

You were the one who made me love myself

You were the one that made me believe in true love

But now

You are the one who makes me walk through life

Alone

You are the one who makes me hate myself

You are the one who makes me believe in true hate

And yet, as I watch you from my corner
Update: I realized that for some odd reason I still love you. And yet I hate you. But I can't live without you. I wrote this poem when I found out that my best guy friend started going out with a girl who he only knew for 3 days, instead of me, who loved him, who knew him for 3 years. He is... show more I realized that for some odd reason

I still love you.

And yet I hate you.

But I can't live without you.







I wrote this poem when I found out that my best guy friend started going out with a girl who he only knew for 3 days, instead of me, who loved him, who knew him for 3 years. He is still with the same girl; but when I was writing this, I was very angry. I still feel the same way, but different. You know?
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