I wrote my intro paragraph for an essay and I just want to get an opinion on it. Thanks!

Probably the most important aspect of a person is their selflessness and kindness towards others. According to Atticus, a character in To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee, “You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view” (30). Maturity and sensitivity arrives when a person can put themself in someone else’s shoes.

3 Answers

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Well, let's deal with the grammar/logical errors first.

    'Probably?' Is it the most important aspect or not? Take a stand!

    "To Kill a Mockingbird," by Harper Lee,

    Maturity and sensitivity ARRIVE when . . .

    It's Atticus Finch, please use the whole name

    Once you get past these, the paragraph basically works for me. However, you certainly can expand on this thought a lot more. How does walking 'in their shoes' demonstrate the qualities you mention? How does this relate to maturity? I might walk in someone else's shoes and think "wow, what a great life."

    Good start!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    u dont need the word probably, and change arrives to arrive. im pretty sure u have to underline to kill a mockingbird. themself should be him/herself. themself is plural. besides that, the intro is pretty short and the u should do more to preview the rest of the essay.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    it sounds good

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