Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 decade ago

Can you ever be able to forgive your wife for getting pregnant while having an affair?

My wife has had an affair and she got pregnant. She had the child as if it were mine. 5 months later I became suspicious and did a paternal test, the baby was not mine. I also found out just before this that she was having an affair. Will I ever be able to forgive her for this?

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Best Answer

    Prabably not, but think about this, would she take you back if you had an affair and a baby on the way?

  • 4 years ago

    Totally depends on the woman. But keep in mind men have short-term memory... women do not ! 1. A woman might forgive a man having an affair depending on what is at risk. Does she have children with her husband? What were the circumstances of the affair? Was her husband the aggressor or the other woman? All these factor into what decision a wife might make. 2. Does the wife still hurt deep down because of the affair. Simple answer is yes. A simple thing like your husband looking at another woman might trigger the whole jealous episode back into the forefront of memory. The quality of their continued relationship.... she may feel inadequate that she cannot perform sexually the same as the mistress or that deep down he still desires her. She may find yourself asking a lot of questions of her husband like what did she do better... of course these can lead into a vicious cycle is hard to get out of. 3. The husband can turn off his feelings for the mistress... this depends totally on the guy. It depends on what feelings he has for his wife versus the other woman. If the mistress is now seeing someone else she may not have interest in the husband and reject him. But if the mistress is readily available and the husband has some argument with his wife or things become tough between them.... the mistress then may become an easy accessible companion once again. Adviceman

  • If as you say that you found out that your wife was having an affair while she was married to you, and she became pregnant, and she had the Baby, and did not tell you that the Baby was not yours, she assumed that you would not be able to find out about it. Now, you want to know if you will be able to forgive her for being unfaithful, my answer to you is no, because you will never be able to trust her for not telling you the truth about the affair and, the Baby to boot. Marriage between two people should be based on honesty,love, and faithfulness. If you feel you will not be able to trust her again, terminate your marriage before the Baby gets older.

    Source(s): none.
  • 1 decade ago

    You could forgive her, I've seen it happen. I guess it would depend on the situation. Were you always faithful? What would make her want to have an affair and have the baby from that person, yet stay with you? There is probably a lot more to this. But only you can decide if you can forgive her or not.

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  • 1 decade ago

    This completely depends on your capability of forgiveness. I think you will never ever forget this pain and will more than likely hold it against her no matter how much you want to let it go. That's a big deal and a lot of drama. If you want to keep her you should do some counseling together to try to make sure this will never happen again, However my suggestion would be to let her go because she did two of the most devious things you can do in a relationship and really you need to ask your self if you want to live with that or walk away.

  • 1 decade ago

    If you choose to forgive her you can... It is all about choices and if you love her you will help her raise the baby as well... If you cannot find it in your heart to forgive her then let her go and move on with your life.... Talk with her and see where she is with thing and if you both want this marriage then work at it but if you dont let her go because if you stay in this marriage because you feel you have to it is not fair to her and the baby.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    No one here can tell you if you can forgive her, that is something only you can decide. Are you having a hard time leaving her or the baby that you thought was yours? Good luck in what ever you do.

  • rtanys
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    It all depends on what priority you place on your feelings for your wife and your marriage. It doesn't seem like your wife has much respect for you and raising another man's child would probably make you the greatest sport in the world, but it would be too much for me. I'd probably leave her and her child. I'd have to wonder how anxious the father would be to take on the responsibility.

  • 1 decade ago

    That would be up to you. I personally would not forgive her if I were you. That is just the lowest of the low, trying to pass off someone elses baby as yours.

  • zether
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    i wasn't able to forgive mine for having an affair, and she didn't get pregnant even

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