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Here's one....you have been abducted by space aliens. Can you write an amusing paragraph or 2 or more that...

includes these movie quotes?

1. We have come to visit you in peace and with goodwill.

2. Boy, don't make me open up a can of whoop-***!

3. For the love of Pete... it's the Wicked Witch and Dopey!

4. Please God, don't let me die on West 31st Street!

5. I find it works well enough to get me from one planet to another.

6. The benefits are terrific. The trick is not to get killed. That's really the key to the benefit program.

8 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    I just came out of KFC with my bucket of 10 chicken pieces and a big tub of gravy, i was on a weight loss diet so i had ordered a diet coke too so it was ok, barbra at weightwatchers wouldnt shout at me, anyways i suddenly noticed a strange light in the sky.. thinking it was just a shooting star i carried on munching on the pieces takin off the skin and jst eating the chicken.. when i suddenly noticed this "star" was becoming extremely big and a horrible low humming sound began to fill the air, the light was beginning to approach me, panicing i picked my fat off the ground and decided to waddle as fast as i could trying not to sh!t my pants, i turned onto west 31st street running.. picking up a sweat now, when i suddenly tripped up throwing my face into a big pile of dog poop, thinking it couldnt get any worse, the star slowly began lowing right over me, getting closer and closer.. with a deep breathe in utter shock and fear, i begged "please god, don't let me die on west 31st street". Looking up at the hoovering craft above me.. it looked like a big bum, then suddenly a large beam shot out of the huge crack in the aircraft, and it began to try to lift me, the beam began to flicker under the strain of trying to pick me up, the big bum aircraft began to shake i began to suddenly yo yo between the floor and the aircraft, when suddenly the beam became strong and i went head first into the crack, but i got stuck as my stomach wouldnt fit through the gap, i started feeling a sucking motion, when with a pop i pushed through the hole like a poo but backwards.. i cant remember anything much after that until, i found myself waking up to see two strange figures in darkness cowering over me.. one was quite large and was quite small, instantly i paniced i tried to roll in to a sitting position but to no ovail, the little figure started to scury towards me from behind when it touched my back, i suddenly fell back and landed on what ever it was, i couldnt get back up all i could hear was mmm g.. offmeee, like somebody struggling for air, then an evil laughter came from the corner of the room.. so i rolled onto my side to find that i'd squashed a little person on the floor.. lookin in horror i looked up to see an ugly woman with the conk the size of the eiffel tower and moley moley moley with more hair growing out of it than elton johns wig.. madness.. FOR THE LOVE OF PETE.. its the wicked witch and Dopey!! had somebody put something in the kfc.. is this real!!?!?! Ive been sucked into an ar*se with the company of the wicked witch and dopey!! this was madness.. the evil woman was still laughing, folding over breathless frm the laughter, im glad some sobody found it funny i just squashed dopey too death, i was about to carry out recusitation on little poor dopey.. but he suddenly caught his breathe and ran away looking at me in fear before colliding with an immense bang with a metal wall, knocking himself out, I managed to roll myself to feet to ask what was going on.. after five minutes she was still a laughin not giving me any answers, i said aloud 'boy, dont make me open up a can of whoop-as.s', yet she carried on.. i managed to waddle 3 metres over to her and slapped her 3 times 'pull yourself to gether woman!', that stopped her laughing.. she then looked at me with an evil skwint.. 'alright alright i was only having a laugh' she said, your on a space ship, youve been abducted and are being taken to Uranus to be put in a zoo.. either that or their gonna put you on a BBQ i think theres enough of you to feed the whole planet' *followed by a cackle* with that comment i slapped her again, this time ripping her mole off with my watch, 'damnit stop doing that!!!' she screamed in rage, then suddenly i heard the clanking of metal, growing louder and louder, suddenly a door began to open with a bright white lights coming from the gap, i took a look at the witch who was equally surprised, dopey was still unconsious.. we then looked back at the door, to see stick figures with large heads heading towards us slowly, me and the witch stepped back together paralysed with fear we stood in amazement, details of these beings heading to wards us were covered by darkness, i closed my eyes praying to god this cant be true.. suddenly i heard a gun shot sound to the right of me where the witch was standing, i looked to the right to see the witch with her wand in her hands, she seemed to have shot herself withit, why? why would she do that? slowly turning from looking to the witch to where these beings were i was horrified at the sight of these ugly beings before me.. it was my worst nightmare.. i had been tossed into the living hell.. nothing could be worse than this.. it wasnt just any beings it was.. it was.. the celebritines!!! paris hilton, lindsay lohan, nicole ritchie and britney speares all lookin at me with glazed eyes and evil smirks.. nothing could be worst than this! i had been abducted by the idiots from a distant world other than mine.. no wonder the witch killed herself, in desperation i fell to the floor grabbed the wand out of the witches hand, putting it to my head and trying to get it to work.. it didnt work, paris hilton started to walk towards me.. in desperation i picked up the witch and threw her at the alien walking towards me, i then managed to reach for dopey too, wizzing him at nicole richie knocking her evil over sized sunglasses from her face, two down 2 to go, lindsay lohan started to rush towards me trying to hit me with her blueberry, a brown substance dripping from her as she ran.. it was fake tan!! i got her hair and began to spin her in the air, she began to mumble something like 'alien prostution- the benefits are terrific, the trick is not to get killed, thats really the jey to the benefit programme, lisssssten' hell i wasnt going to listen to an air head like that so i let go and heard her hit a wall, next minute i had another attack on my hand from britney spears, this time it wasnt physical i could hear her voice in my head.. 'southern fried chicken, im your friend, i have southern friend chicken.. my mom makes southern fried chicken..' suddenly realising that she was brain washing me i shuck my head, realising her evil bribes of southern fried chicken were not going to work she began to move to wards me,, i jumped in the air and managed to hold a matrix style pose in the air, when she was close enough i kicked her in the face.. throwing her 5 foot into the air, in which she landed in the pile of bimbos on the floor.. i didnt know what to do next, with the adrenal pumping through my body and the sweat pouring off me like niagra falls i began to waddle towards the open door.. slowly approaching a blinding white light i closed my eyes and walked forward.. when i could hear a conversation 'i find it works well nough to get me from one planet to another' i recognised the voice.. no. noo it couldnt be please no.. please nooooo, i opened my eyes to be surrounded by hell.. i was surrounded by more evil alien beings... i was on the set of laguna beach.. more bottle blonde bimbos and air head jocks surrounded me looking at me with evil smiles, i screamed pulling my hair out 'noooooooooooooooooo' they started to walk towards me with open arms, there was no way out, they began to chant at me 'join ussssss, become ussss....' i couldnt escape..

    at present i weigh like 88pounds yay! have had over 10 calories today someone pass me a tooth brush, im having like a totally awesome time like like oh my god im just so beautiful.. admire me love me .. adore meeeeeee pleaseeee...

    a sad sad ending, i have been celebritized and trapped in this hell of egotism..

    story by angelgirl

    Source(s): thanks for the challenge.. sorry it wasnt an overly good storyline lol i think i just beat any record for yahoos longest answer lol!!!
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  • 4 years ago

    Keep a little water glass, which you should refill often, instead of a big water bottle on your cubical.

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  • 4 years ago

    Drink lots involving water. (You'll stand up for refills and trips for the bathroom. )

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  • 3 years ago

    Enroll in an active artwork class, such as sculpture or maybe ceramics.

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  • Anonymous
    3 years ago

    Obtain a plant for your office—watering it will eventually make you more active.

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  • 3 years ago

    Stand up each time you talk within the phone.

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  • 4 years ago

    I do believe when you get smaller ones belly and also get used to having much less, it helps.

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  • 4 years ago

    Stand up each time you talk about the phone.

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