My sister is 14 years old and she's having a baby,but I refuse to wathc it.She thinks I hate her.What can I do
She's pregnant with a baby girl named Megan.
- 1 decade agoFavorite Answer
Try and talk with your sister about this. Just tell her that you are not comfortable with watching. She should understand. But I would like to tell you this, I watched my niece being born and this is the most amazing thing I have ever witnessed. I don't regret it at all, and would give anything to have the chance again. Truly amazing. My niece is now 13 years old and we still have that special bond. More so than with my other nieces and nephews. I wasn't actually in the room when any of them were born. You should really think about this. And you can be in the room when your niece is born, just make sure you are at the head of your sister's bed. Hope this helps.
Happy New Year!!!
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Looking at your profile to get a better idea of the situation, you see in order to give you the best advice I needed to know if you were the older or younger sister - I see that you are obviously the older sister.
Having a sister myself I see both scenario's. She - looks up to you because you're her big sister. She probably looks for support from other people as any other teen but she probably holds your opinions of her closer to her heart. Because whether she admits it or not she does look up to you.
I understand how you probably wouldn't want to be there because you're just a kid yourself. So it may be uncomfortable for you - which is fine. (horror story - my older sister use to rob the romote control and watch maternity ward when I was your age - I either left the room or cringed the whole time).
On a piece of paper - brain storm. Think and jot down all the reasons you're uncomfortable going, and be honest. Ask one or both of your parents for some time to sit down and talk. Tell them but be sure to be sarcastic (because it won't go well) tell maturly why you're uncomfortable about this, and you need some help breaking this to your sister.
I promise no matter what your family may consist of when they see how you're handling this as an adult, they will be proud and reach out to help. They can help explain it better to you sister that not going has nothing to do with your love for your sister, that you yourself are human - and I'm not putting you down here - you're probably confused about this just as much as she is.
When I say confused, I mean you have thoughts or questions that may get tossed around from time to time in your head. I'm sure there's a few you can answer and there again I'm sure there's times you sit back and think - my little sister's having a kid!?!? And she's still a kid?!?!
I hope you understand what I mean.
It also would be good for you to help with your sister. By helping I don't mean becoming her slave. By helping I mean - if the baby is going to have it's own room - decorating it. If it's not - maybe ask Mom and Dad if you can have some cash to buy her, her own personalized blanket. Something to show you care. It also wouldn't be bad if you walk in after the baby is born and tell her how brave she is, for going through with this.
That's the best advice I have for you, Please take care of yourself and best wishes for both - you, your sister, and niece.
- meka gLv 61 decade ago
Shes the one that had the baby. Tell her its not that you hate her she has to take responsibility for the mess she created. Your not obligated to watch her child shes 14 she knew the consequences when she gapped her legs open. If she needs a babysitter while shes in school she shouldve thought about all that before she had a baby. Be her support but dont let her throw that baby off on you. The day she laid down and got pregnant is the day she lost her childhood theirs no getting that back for her until her own kid is grown. She thinks shes gonna hang with friends and still have a life while your in their watching her kid. Tell her up front im not your babysitter and you will not use mebut you know what I STILL LOVE YOU AND IM HERE WHEN YOU NEED SOMEONE TO TALK TO!!! happy new year.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
i feel very bad for your sister as she is so very young and just a baby herself. childbirth can be pretty scary specially for a young girl of 14 and she needs all the help she can get. i am sure your mom will be there to help her but she may want her sister to be with her. i do not know how old you are but be with her in the hospital and you can tell her that she will always be your sister no matter what. don't condemn her for the situation she is in as life will be difficult for her. having a baby so young is very difficult and a long haul of hardship ahead of her. it is too late to point a finger at her and now is the time to hang together and help her as she feels bad about herself. she feels you are judging her and maybe you are. but put it behind you and be there for her. you do not have to be there while she gives birth if it is too much for you, but tell her you will be in the hospital and not too far away from her if she needs you. also, make her feel good and tell her you are excited about your little niece or nephew coming and that little baby will be your little baby too. maybe go out and buy some little thing for her baby like bibs or booties and show her what you bought for her new baby. she will be so grateful you have feelings for her new baby. help her. she is suffering. and sometimes one makes a mistake in life and has a long time to pay for the mistake. don't punish her as she will have a hard time from now on.
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- JudithLv 61 decade ago
Does your mom want another baby to raise along with raising the 14 yr old?
So many people are dying to adopt & would make wonderful parents giving the child a better life than your 14 yr old sister is capable of. I will never forget how joyful my sister & brother-in-law were when they got my nephew. They waited for him for 5 yrs after filing papers to adopt.
Your reluctance to watch is so understandable; she is way too young to have & keep a child. If she opts for adoption it would be best for you not to see the baby when she is born. But if she keeps Megan you will fall in love with her.
- ?Lv 71 decade ago
DEAR sit her down and have a heart to heart talk i just went through it so i know what you are going through with this my cousin was in high school and a cheerleader she dated a football player she is not married a single mother trying to raise a baby on her own the baby's name is Emma Kay my cousin thought i hated her too let her know you do not OK give her lots of love you both may cry we did so have something for the tears OK
- 1 decade ago
Explain to her that you do love her, but, to watch Megan being born might be a little much for you to see. She will need you to be with her, but she has to understand that some things about birth might be too much for some people to watch (I know--almost blacked out once myself.). Once Megan is born, though, do all you can to be with them both and help your sister with what promises to be a very trying time for a teen mother--but also, a very rewarding time--especially with all the firsts she will experience. Of course, this is there isn't already plans for Megan to be adopted out. Good Luck--both of you!
- gelflingLv 71 decade ago
Childbirth is pretty gross, but also kind of cool. For a 14-year-old, it will probably be worse than with a grown woman.
Your sister is probably just scared and wants you there for company. You might be able to be in the room supporting her WITHOUT actually looking at the blood and gory stuff. If you don't want to, she should respect your wishes.
Watching childbirth will probably make you NOT want to risk getting pregnant anytime soon, so that could be good. SHE should probably watch it so she doesn't put herself in this predicament again!!
- grannywinkieLv 61 decade ago
You wait until you see that baby. She is beautiful and needs love just as you do. Your sister is just a baby also. She needs you so much. Please do not be so cold and critical of her and the baby. Be careful, what goes around comes around. Get rid of hate, you can never be happy with your attitude. I like your sister and her baby. I wish I knew her and could be there to let her know she is loved.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Tell her she got into this problem and she'll have to get out of it.Watch the baby when it's 100% nessary but not just because she wants to go out.Good Luck.If she wants you to keep it maybe she should let you adopt her.I'm not trying to be rude but I dont think your sister should be raising a baby if she wants someone else to keep it.