I have a extreme anger problem.!!!!!!!?
I keep myselfr in the house as much as i can to stay away from people.I have been to talk to therapists and been on paxil and seroquel. I have 2 children and I do not want to be a happy pill popping junkie by day and a sedative popper at night so I dont take them at all.I feel i'll be okay as long as i stay away from ignorant people!! As we know they are everywhere..Soi that's why I stay in the house I know I am a ticking time bomb and i feel i am handling my situation best as possible I just would like to know if anyone has any better advice.
- Anonymous1 decade agoFavorite Answer
An Anger Problem Is . . .
An anger problem is any anger-related behavior that can be hurtful to ourselves or to another person. Anger problems can alienate loved ones, undermine the credibility of the person who has the anger problem and result in consequences that punish everyone. Misdirected anger is a dance we do. And we may do it around or with our families or at work.
We can teach you how to change!
Anger is Not An Enemy
Anger is a good thing. It is a defense mechanism—it signals us when we are getting into physically or emotionally unsafe situations. The real enemy is the reactions we learn to anger that have unfavorable consequences to ourselves and others.
Indicators of an Anger Problem
Physically or emotionally abusing another person.
Accepting physical or emotional abuse from another person.
Attempting to control or dominate other people.
Feeling controlled or dominated by someone.
Feeling attacked, unfairly criticized or shamed.
Feeling the need to shame others.
An inability to comfortably relate to other people.
Feeling "uncontrollable" rage.
Being in a close relationship with anyone who has an anger problem.
Creating a Safe Environment
The key to coping with anger is to learn how to respond to it instead of reacting to it. Our educational and training programs can provide the tools to change an unsafe environment to a safe one by learning how to respond to our own anger reasonably and responsibly.
Respond . . . not react! . . . . . . . Nobody makes me anything, and I don't make anybody anything! . . . . . . . . If I don't know what to do, it's the wrong time to do it!
Anger—a feeling that tells me I'm hurt and that I don't want to be hurt.
Abuse—any mental, emotional or physical act of not caring that comes from someone who is responsible for caring about me.
Rage—an emotional experience that can become violent; starts with mind-talk and leads to losing control.
Mind-talk—internal dialoging that deteriorates and leads to the first stages of rage. This happens when I cannot stop the internal dialoging and I may lose control of my emotional and thought processes.
Violence—any abuse, either emotional, verbal, physical, spiritual or sexual, that is the "enforcement" of abuse.
Control—domination. A way of trying to feel safe, but usually at the expense of others.
Victim—an erroneous label for a person who is perceived as being without power; a destructive label given to people who have been abused. This label can deny that person the power to change or take responsibility for their own behavior.
Guilt—a feeling that comes from really having done something wrong.
Shame—an unnatural feeling that is taught and feels like guilt. The message that there is something wrong with me as a person. It was probably taught to me as a child and I now may use it on myself or others as an adult.
Vulnerability—the ability to know that I feel.
Intimacy—feeling safe in someone else's space.
Trust— not being angry or afraid even if the other person is armed with emotional or physical weapons.
Power—the ability to get what I want through my efforts and through those who would share with me.
Respect—the measurement of honor we give and receive to ourselves and others for who we are, how we conduct ourselves and how we fulfill our obligations. Respect is the opposite of shame. "
- CrazyChickLv 71 decade ago
Please don't take this the wrong way:
You speak of "ignorant people", but the whole "happy-pill popping junkie" thing is a pretty ignorant statement.
First, if your problem is anger, then in addition to any so-called "happy pills" you would be prescribed, it would probably be recommended that you attend anger management classes. This could actually fix the problem.
Second, "happy pills" aren't what they were a decade or two ago. Back then, they were more like tranquilizers. Now, there are low-dose antidepressants that make you really feel neither happy or sad, but put you on a level playing field emotionally.
Years and years ago, amphetamines and barbituates were used to regulate the ups and downs for people who had various disorders. These days, most people on antidepressants have no problem with fulfilling regular daily activities, up to and including going to sleep at night.
I don't understand how you can claim to be "handling it" at all. You're a prisoner to your own temper, and you're exposing your children to bizaare behavior, what with the anger, the jail time, and the seclusion. It seems to me that you couldn't worsen your state by taking antidepressants, since it doesn't seem like you're in a great state right now anyway. What could it hurt?
- 1 decade ago
Personally, it sounds like Intermittent Explosive Disorder, or anxiety with a chemical mood inbalance, either way, you need to be medicated and go a psychaitrist about once a month and an anger management specialist, either alone or in a group once a week or more. Once you learn coping skills and you find the right medicines, you can taper down the anger management to once a week, then twice a month, then once a month, and some can get off of it altogether, as long as you are still going to your regular psychaitrist. Don't think of it as a pill popping junkie, but as a loving mom trying to keep herself sane for her children's sake and for the world's sake. Normally people without anxiety don't think of the world as full of ignorant people. You are right about one thing, you are a ticking time bomb! You really do need to take those meds. If you don't like those meds, ask your doctor for an alternative. There are lots out there. If you don't like the doctor, get a new one. Do whatever it takes to make yourself better! Good Luck!Source(s): Dealing with husband with Intermittent Explosive Disorder, Oppositional Defiance Disorder, ADHD, Bi-Polar, and Anxiety for the last 4 1/2 years.
- 1 decade ago
Try a keyword search for Dr. Peter Breggin or www.Breggin.com, where you will find a significant number of people fighting against psychiatric drugs, that antidepressants can actually cause suicidal and even aggressive behavior.
A couple had an arguement at a 7 11 - a bored cop was right on them for having heated words, and both of them got thrown in jail (just for an arguement) - they then had a temporary restraining order against each other (which neither of them wanted or asked for) and even the gal ended up with a $50,000 bond if she wanted to get out of jail.
The drugs may be causing the abnormal mood swings, and what one lawyer calls "involuntary intoxication" (on a drug like Prosac) - the legal authorties are having a hay-day throwing people in jail.
What, should we all get frontal labotomies and walk around like zombies? Even Jesus Christ made a whip and drove the money changers out of the Temple - our emotions are valid.
What do you think?
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- 1 decade ago
some times anger gest ticked off if some one does something you dont like, like i do, my brother drinks out the milk bottle and makes me angry, or some times when you dont get enough sleep or just cant be arsed to do anything and people are being annoying gets you angry, the best thing to do is to sit on your sofa after a hards day work have some candles with a nice hot choclate or tea and watch a romantic film, but the bestest thing for me, watch a comedy, like lee evans normally when im angry i watch lee evans and my anger is over, just try that if it dosnt work then i hope you get better in the future
- 1 decade ago
Find a therapist you are comfortable with and work past whatever has you so angry. I think you'll find that you can't become enough of a hermit to avoid getting angry. Of course people can be stupid, but what is it that hinders you from being able to deal with that? Find the answer to that question, deal with it, and you don't have to live sequestered or drugged anymore.
If it's all about them, they have all the power. If you can find what it is about you, you can do something about it. There's hope in that.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
It`s OK,you`r just crazy,and you have the right to be.In this world we all need our space.Sometimes it seems that everybody wants to share that space or take it away from us.I have a hard time trying to talk to people.Find someone with enough gray matter that can talk.What I hate is someone that takes to long on anything.I do`nt have the time to wait on them to get there brain in drive.If they can`t get the brain and mouth to work I might as well be sleeping.
- 123..WAIT!Lv 51 decade ago
I think you should stay on the pills and quit putting negative names on it, it could help you and it sounds like it would be a real benefit to your kids. For them I think I'd just try NOT to look at is as a bad thing, and more that maybe your doing it for them.
- 1 decade ago
What I hear you saying is you would rather be a hostage in your own home, rather than take a pill and enjoy life? Hmmm. That in itself isn't healthy.
What happens when your children do something ignorant? And they will, trust me. Are you going to beat them silly or verbally abuse them?
Take the pills and do yourself, and your children a favor by giving them a fair chance and happy life.
- 1 decade ago
dont take no drungs that makes the problem worse and you dont want your children to see that type of things. all i can tell you to do is to count to 10 when some one get on your nerves or just breath real hard