What Should I do?
I'm "Semi-Out" I out to all my friends but not my parents. Anywasy my friend's mom found out that I was Gay(Don't Ask how b\c I'm Not Sure) & She's putting a "strain" on my friend and my friendship. I can't talk to her. I can't go to her house, She can't go to mine, We can't all each other, she's abbned from talking to me. What Should I Do? can I do anything?
* She's 16 and I'm 16
- Anonymous1 decade agoFavorite Answer
there is nothing u can do.... just talk to people who accept u for who u r and don't worry about those who don't.... that is how the world is....Source(s): Kadija S
- SeekerLv 41 decade ago
You cannot control what others do, say or think. You have power only over yourself and your own decisions. I would suggest you refrain from feeling anger, resentment or self-pity as much as possible because these are all negative emotions. If you are able, let your friend know that you would like to remain friends and to keep the lines of communiction open as much as possible. Perhaps this can still be done at school. Once the ball is in her court let her make the next play. Give her time to adjust to the new situation. Don't pressure her or force the issue. Be patient. Sometimes just waiting in silence is what being a friend is about.
Meanwhile you need to consider that if you are semi-out and your friend's mother has learned that you are gay it is only a matter of time before your parents learn this as well. It would be much better if they learned it from you rather than from the grapevine. So you need to think about this carefully and prepare for it. If you know your parents would be supportive this might be a good time to come out to them. If you know they would have a lot of issues and be very negative you may be better off waiting till you are self-supporting. But you have placed yourself in a very difficult position here and need to find an effective way to deal with it.
For more good advice look at the Best Answer here:
- 1 decade ago
Dude, get over it. Her mom is just a homophobic ****, and there's nothing you can do about it because she's not your mom (thank God). Anyways, you can still talk to her at school right? If you feel lonely, find other fag hags whose moms aren't like hers. Or better, find a boy friend. But keep it a secret from your parents though. If you want somebody who knows you best, find somebody who has probably been through the same thing. If not, be friends with straight guys that are not jerks or jocks. Hope I've been some help.
- BethLv 41 decade ago
ha ha. Something like this happened to me when I was 18 or 19. My friends dad didn't want me to see my friend-he though I was a bad influnce on her (she is 3 years younger than I)...he also thought I was in love with her! we tryed to keep in touch...and bam! About 1 year later-it all feel into place. We have been friends for 15 years now. It depends on how old you are. If your friend is under 18 and still lives with mommy and daddy, she better learn to just obey her parents and wait...untill she and you are 18. Believe me-time will take its course and things will work out if it is meant to be. how does your mom and dad think and feel about this? Are they understanding adults or are they more closed minded? Have you even tried to ask them? You should let your parents know. Believe me-they were teenagers too! Before you decide that you are "what you are"-(if you are a teenager) I would wait. you could be bi-sexual. I had a long debate with myself-wondering if I am bi-sexual or full blown lesbian. It is best to talk to your parents about this. I know it may be embarrassing, but your parents are the best to go to about this! If I had a daughter or a son that was gay-I wouldn't want him to keep it from me. I would want my son or daughter to come to me. Hope everything works out one way or another!Source(s): Experience
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- Anonymous1 decade ago
When you are in your parents house you follow your parents rules. At 16 you are too young to fully understand what you are getting yourself into if you decide to come out but keep it from your parents. That is too immature. You're parents shoud come first if you are truly commited otherwise you are doing yourself a huge diseverice. If you are so unsure that you have to ask this question in this forum you should realize at some point you should give your parents a chance. It will make all of you a better person in the long run.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
you can't do anything because the mother is in charge. you could sneak around but that would only infuriate her more. you could try to talk to her but she most likelt won't listen.don't make a big deal of it, ignore her and in time she might come around. In the meantime you can still have your friendship, but just be careful, the mother could make your life miserable.
- DragonflygirlLv 71 decade ago
ok, as the product of a gay marriage.. my dad was gay,and my mom,bi, I will tell it to ya likes i sees it, ok?? As a parent,I want my kids to be honest with me... Totally honest. As a mom,if u were mine,I would say," sweeti,is there anything you need to tall me?" And I would hope u would take the hint to tell me. No parent wants to hear that their beautiful baby is gay/bi/wants to change genders,ect. It shocks us to the core. But we,as parents,need to have honesty if our relationships with our beautiful children is to flourish. You,as kids,expect us to be honest with you,right?? Well,i would want my kids to be honest with me. So,tell your frien's mom,that yes, you are gay ( are u SURE??? i am assuming you are positively sure you are gay) and that no,you are not interested in her kid,and that yes,you still want to be her kids friend. And let the mom take it from there. You,hun,can't please everyone,and some ppl will not be as tolerable of gay ppl as others,but we do the best we can and hope for the best,leave the rest . I hope I helped.And sweeti?? Come out to your 'rents. ok?? They deserve to know.
- 1 decade ago
thats a hard one!!! ive only told 3 people im bi, not my parents! LOL the only thing i can think of, is to have ur parents ask them if their anti-gay, problem is youll have to tell ur parents, id tell them by first asking them if they are against gays and go from there!
- ?Lv 51 decade ago
you dont say how old you are...or the age of your friend.. can you tell one of your parents the one you think will be the most understanding..that is what my daughter did .. although i have a bit of a promblem cause the one she is with is a first cousin.. most family members still dont know yet.
- 1 decade ago
You probably shouldn't piss off your friend's mom anymore than she already is. So don't try to contact your friend for a while. See if her mom will cool off.
- 1 decade ago
Talk to your friend at school