Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 decade ago

what should i do with my husband?

my husband is a lazy man he loves to stay up at night and watch

tv and sleep during the day he always gets a job and doesn't last with him only few months we got a child he's 20 months old he's also in love with video games he hates going out or having fun im always having fights with him about the way he is i don't know what to do with him any more please help me


the problem is that he tells me he's going to do better but he never changes

Update 2:

the only thing on my mind and worried about is my 20 months old son and if i left him and got remarried i don't wana loose my only child i love my son more than anything in the world

Update 3:

it's verry hard for me to make a decision when my child is in my life

Update 4:

my job sucks i want a work at home job so i can take care of my son and work

14 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    I really feel for you. What kind of example is your husband setting for your son? Children learn by what we do, not what we say. You and your child deserve better. Maturity is not just an age. He has a responsibility to you and his son to provide a stable home. It would be easier on you to support one than to support two. If he doesn't change, he will just drag you down with him. I wish you the best in whatever you decide to do. Remember, this is your life too.

  • 1 decade ago

    I had some similar problems. Have you tried counseling? That could help. Bottom line...if the counseling doesn't work....then move on. You should be Happy!!!! You deserve to be happy! I eventually got divorced. I am now remarried and very happy.

    I also had a child with my first husband. I stood my ground and told him that I will take custody of my son. You will not loose your child to a man who can not keep a job. It is very scary to think of doing it on your own. I never thought I could do it, but I did. I am now very happy today. I am with a man who makes me laugh every day and treats me like a queen. He also works his butt off to support his family!

    Your child will eventually adjust! Why be miserable????? Your child will eventually come to know how you feel!!!!

    I also quit work to take care of my son. To be did not work out. I really wanted to have that time with my son, but it was not realistic. We got way behind on our bills and I had to go back to work. We have to eventually face it.....some people have it easy like that...where they can stay home with there child. Right have a man that can't keep a job. So I would def. say it is far in your future to be able to stay home. Most home based businesses do not work. Sorry to be a downer!!!!!

  • 1 decade ago

    I had the same problem with my husband. Finally, I just started to go about my life as if he was not there, whether he was or not. I refused to do his laundry and primarily ignored him. After a week or two he got the picture. Mine has been out of work for 6 weeks and just went back to work this past week. He knows if he does not keep this job, I'm leaving him. I don't need an adult child to support as well as my actual children.

    Pretty much you have to make up your mind you and not going to put up with this anymore and let him know.

  • 1 decade ago

    Talk to him about what you want from him. Sounds depressed. Is he on drugs? Whatever, he needs to take responsibility. You have to decide if you can live with this situation. He will only change though if HE wants to so don't nag him to death about it. He'll only get resentful. You have a decision to make. Good luck!

    Why would you lose your son? I know the unknown is scary but you'll be fine.

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  • 1 decade ago

    What was he like before you married him? if he was the same way and you thought he would change, you are now seeing what you should have then and never married him. But now you have a child and he needs to be come more responsible, , or you are going to have to make some hard decisions, and good luck with that one

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    You would enjoy your son more if you weren't so unhappy, and without a job he's hardly in the position to take your son. He'd have to prove you unfit for that, and that's pretty hard to do. Get rid of him, he sounds like a leech. Find someone who'll at least pull his own weight.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Your husband lacks the maturity for marriage. If he won't maintain a job, you cannot plan a future with him. You would be wise to chalk this one up and get out of the relationship, at least until he grows up. You don't need two children to raise.

  • 1 decade ago

    What you have to realize now is that you do have a son and he should be first priority. You have to decide what is best for him. It sounds to me that not only does your husband care about working for himself he doesn't care about being a provider for you or your son and you both deserve more.

  • jude
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    problem is there are no consequences for his behavior, he acts so immature and isn't responsible enough to have a family. he is still a teenager in his mind. make him leave for awhile, if he doesn't straighten up, u may have to get a divorce, and move on and find someone who is willing to be a partner in life. there has to be consequences for his behavior.

  • 1 decade ago

    Start drinking heavily. Or you could just do what every other normal person in the world does, and leave his sorry ***.

    Hope this helps.

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