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Jeff asked in HealthMental Health · 1 decade ago

Should i reveal to my girlfriend that i'm on antidepressants or will she break up with me because of it?

What should i do? She's said a few times that it looks like i'm on drugs when she looks in my eyes she asks me are you altered and i'm like no but i'm just on Wellbutrin and i dont wanna reveal that i'm on Wellbutrin so what should i do what do you people think i should do would it be too controversial if i revealed it

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    If she breaks up with you over that you should be glad you found out how shallow she is. Taking anti depressants is no worse than taking insulin for diabetes, or medication for heart problems. You ar fixing your problem. Don't be ashamed of it.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I think it's a terrible shame that in the year 2007 sufferer's still fear the stigma of mental illness. It's NOT a character flaw, it's an illness. If you genuinely fear telling her it means you don't trust her reaction and - that you don't trust HER (yet). "she's said a few times that it looks like i'm on drugs.." Wellbutrin is not heroin or crack. You shouldn't appear "altered" in the first place. Just wanted also to let you know that the word "altered" is a synoneym for the word "castrated" so it's probably a good idea NOT to use the word "altered" when describing your appearance.

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  • 1 decade ago

    I don't understand why you would need to reveal this to her. You being on this medication does not affect her adversely in any way. I suppose it depends on how serious the relationship is. I am on medication for anxiety and a couple of past boyfriends have known about it. One of them, an EMT, said that there are so many people on this type of medication these days, and that is more common than many would think to be on an antidepressant/anti-anxiety medication.

    If you do tell her and she has an issue with it, consider yourself better off without her. Anyone who would judge a person by a medication that they are on is simply being superficial.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    If the relationship is not really all that serious, then don't tell her. If it's pretty long-term though, she's gonna find out eventually, so go ahead and reveal your secret. If she really cares about you and isn't a scientologist, she probably won't think too much of it.

    I understand where your coming from, I'm on Antidepressants too, but I never tell any of the guys I date. That could be because I'm a high shcooler in a small town in the south though...

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Only she can answer the breakup aspect of this.

    There's no shame in being on Wellbutrin. You're smart enough to get help for your depression. Big sordid secrets give people a handle on you. Open facts give people no handle.

    How can I tell you this? I'm on Zoloft and I don't care who knows. If I had ulcers, I'd be on Tagamet. If I had blood clots, I'd be on Coumadin. I have depression, so I'm on Zoloft.

    If considers your depression a dealbreaker, good riddance to her.

    Good luck. I hope she's a decent sort and sticks around.

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  • Oh jesus! just tell her. If she dumps you then you're better off. Obviously you are on Welbutrin for a good reason (also known as Zyban), and the simple fact that you are in tune with your body, are willing to divulge in a doctor, and take something to help you well-being should say a lot about you in a good way. You are off to a good start with medicines, probably going to some type of therapy, now you just have to learn how to admit to the general public, including your girlfriend, that you have depression. Statistically, most Americans at some point or another in their life have been treated for depression, and there are many more out there who have depression, but haven't gotten help for it yet.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    It depends onhow mature she is. It also depends on how long you have known her. It sounds like you have doubts about it so I wouldn't do it.

    I know a guy on antidepressants and he tells everyone right away and he has a new grilfriend and he told her right away but she is a social worker and she is on them herself so she didn't care.

    In your case, since you are not sure, don't do it. Why should you, there is plenty of time. Make sure she is in love and devoted to you first. You don't want to scare her off if the relationship is fairly new. Or if she is too young, like under 30, to deal with it like an adult.

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  • 1 decade ago

    First and foremost, I think you may want to look into getting on a different medication. There are several antidepressants out there, and you could probably find one that doesn't cause you to be kind of zoned out.

    When I first met my husband, he had the attitude that I just needed to "cheer up", and I don't think he really understood the severity of my depression or the need for antidepressants until we were married for almost five years. The way I see it is like this: if I had diabetes, no one would suggest insulin wasn't necessary. If I had heart problems, no one would suggest I not take my heart medication. But people look at depression (a "disease of the mind") as something that is there, but is not really a disease. It is. Fight for your right to use all possible resources to fight it.

    You don't mention if your girlfriend has openly showed skepticism about antidepressants. If that isn't the case, she could end up being relieved if you're "just on Wellbutrin" instead of on some kind of illegal, unhealthy, or dangerous drugs.

    Whether or not you tell her, though, is entirely up to you. Unfortunately, there is still a stigma to being on meds for depression, but it is getting more common, and the more common it gets, the more accepted it gets. I don't think it's wise to tell everyone you know you're on depression meds (you wouldn't tell everyone you know you're on some other kinds of meds), but if you're in a serious relationship, you may want her to know.

    If you decide to tell her, do a little "self-talk" first. The depression and the meds for it are not wrong. There is nothing wrong or even all that unusual these days about taking meds for mental/emotional issues. Depression is a physical condition having to do with hormones and chemicals in your brain, and depression helps level that playing field so that you can get "normal", much in the same way as a proper dose of insulin for a diabetic gets them not over-the-top, but to a normal blood sugar. The so-called "happy pills", which were often a kind of tranquilizer, are headed in the same direction as electric shock therapy as a way to treat mental disorders. These days, medication for depression allows you to appear and act and feel like you would if you had no issue at all. It doesn't cause you to be manic OR depressed. It just evens you out. That is, if you are taking the right medication for you, in the right dosage.

    If your girlfriend doesn't respond well to hearing that you're on antidepressants, try to educate her on the various points of mental disorders and the medications used to treat them. If she still isn't supportive, I don't think you'd be out of bounds to consider if you really want to be with a woman who has a problem with you doing what you need to do to overcome something that causes you to suffer like depression does.

    Best of luck to you!

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  • 1 decade ago

    You need to be honest with her. Wellbutrin is not a big deal. Just tell her, and if she breaks up with you, then you are better off without her.

    good luck

    Source(s): peer health counseling experience; psych degree
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  • 1 decade ago

    It is a common thing now. It shouldn't be controversial. The only thing now is how you said you weren't on drugs she might be less than happy that you didn't tell her then. But if you explain that you were embaressed or for whatever reason you didn't tell her before she should understand and be supportive. I don't see why that would turn her away.

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