do u feel that when yr in need of a listening ear?
u find that no one is exactly interested in your miserable life. but when your are happy people just want to join in the fun..
thats why i rather bottle up how i am feeling . looks ok on the surface but all upside down inside..u realised the term true friend is..
.anyone been through this??
- 1 decade agoFavorite Answer
totally agree with you, but thank God it is not everywhere the case. People of certain part of the world seem to be more superficial than others and effectively don't want to have to deal with problems. I also think it has to do with culture, some cultures are more oriented toward human values while others are more driven by success and money therefore don't want to lose their focus on some emotional or personal issues. If you feel like talking to someone about your miserable life I think it should be easier to address the problem to someone who is from the same culture than yours, this would allow a stronger connection. If your "friends" don't show interest in your difficulties then they are definitely not your friends. Friends should be their for you for the worst and the better. You definitely should not bottle up your emotion, this could lead to sadness anxiety and even depression. If you can't find any good friend with who you can share your feelings and emotions you should consult a psychotherapist who will greatly listen and offer suggestion in improving your feeling toward any difficult situation.
- 1 decade ago
I can definitely relate and to put it simply...it sucks.
I've always kept things to myself until I befriended someone a few years ago. She and I became best friends and she would always tell me to share my feelings more and that it wasn't good to keep them bottled up.
We would share things all the time but all of that came to a screeching halt not too long ago. I started to realize that I was always there for her, 24/7 and she was never there for me. She'd call me with boyfriend trouble late at night and no matter how tired I was I'd listen for hours. I can't even tell you how many times I was there for her. But when it was my turn, she didn't listen to me and even said to me once, "I have some stuff going on in my own life right now and I can't deal with anyone elses' drama." Needless to say, that stung.
I also realized that when I was at my worst in terms of feeling down, she was there to hang out because it made her feel better about herself. It was as if she felt above me. She didn't want to listen to the details, she just needed to know that I was down and that was enough for her.
Recently, I made a lot of changes in my life and things have turned completely around. And where is she? Nowhere to be found. Because I feel good about myself and she doesn't feel good about herself, she can't hang with me and feel better than me. So she has turned towards a former co-worker that she has constantly made fun of and put down and substitued her for me.
It's hard to find that person that you can trust and spill your guts to. And it's hard to keep smiling when inside you're far from being happy. If you can't rely on someone, try blogging or even posting your thoughts here.
Hang in there!
- JAMI ELv 51 decade ago
YEP! they will try and feed off your energy if your outgoing and happy go lucky. I spend alot of time alone now. Teenagers dont do that though. just sad miserable adults?
- amantraLv 61 decade ago
hmm im a bit like you..i keep most of d sad things wid me, but wen m wid my friends i forget about it...cause their company gives me happiness....if ure feeling really down, u shud tell ure feelings to a very close friend who cud understand u, if not able to help you...or best you can keep a diary, its ure very own personal friend, u can pour down all your worries, happy times in them...at least ull be opening up to someone
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- 1 decade ago
every one at some point feels that way. we all nead some one to talk to that we can trust with confidence
- Anonymous1 decade ago
somedays. but not tonight....decided to go sing and party afterall.
sorry I cant stay and chat....
:) come on! get happy!!