Do you think it is harder for a man to come out of the closet than a woman?

Maybe I'm wrong, but I feel society is more vicious towards gay men than gay women. What do you think? Also, are you still in the closet and afraid to come out - like me? Pathetic I know, but I really feel my life would crumble if I did, and I don't think I could deal with it. Anyway, Thanks for honest and sincere answers. Happy New Years!

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    it is, I personally took 2.5 years to come out as bisexual because I didn't want people thinking I was weird, abnormal, etc. Society tends to turn a blind eye towards lesbians/bi girls because girls really dont mind and a lot of guys, albeit disgustingly, like to "watch" and find it hot for girls to like other girls. Girls again dont mind, and have a lot of fun hanging out with, gay/bi guys; however, a majority, if not a large majority of straight guys are extremely homophobic, leading to a lot less acceptance for gay guys than gay girls. If you have accepting friends, however, I think you should come out because you are just lying to yourself and society if you dont. If your friends dont accept your homosexuality, then maybe they really arent that great of friends. The longer you wait to come out, the longer it will be until you can be truly happy in a relationship in which you can love the person you are dating, one with a guy.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Yes, society is more accepting of women. I really don't know why though. Like everyone is saying, maybe because men are expected to be more masculine. In today's world, even straight women have rejected typical roles. Males, however, still hold onto theirs...even though I can see that men are progressivly becoming more involved fathers as a direct result of women demanding equlity in marriage. I guess some people might think that the actual sex that two men have is "gross," while women sex isn't to them...but let me count how many times my g/f and I have straped it on and...never mind. Even straight couples do it that way, so whatever. There are a bizillion ways to have sex. Why does everyone else care so much what they think. I started coming out the day I found out I was a lesbo. It was easy....you've just gotta have that attitude that you are a valid person just like everyone else, and if they don't like it...well, they can shove it...you know ;)

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  • Darcy
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    Let's not be silly here. It's 2011, women are highly aware of the fact that the majority of men watch porn. Lots of women watch porn too! Thing is, some women are willing to look around for the minority of men who don't watch it...and wait as long as it takes to find one. I don't see the problem with that - everyone has a different set of standards. I put a sh*tload of stock into loyalty and considerateness, almost to an obsessive degree. So do some men. I don't see the problem with it.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Yeah - I would agree. Gay men (like myself) have a lot more to lose when we come out. Look at the str8 porn world - two women together are apparently the rage - but not two men. Straight men don't like the idea that some of their kind like to be more submissive and feminine. Religion also doesn't like us too well. I should know - I attempted suicide twice. I'm out now, and my counselor pretty much has told me to stay away from evangelical churches (apparently that's the prescription) It's a hard journey no matter what gender you are.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Hi, Sweetie. Happy New Year to you, too!

    Yes, I think that, in general, gay men face more difficulties and dangers when coming out than homosexual women. However, I think gay men have more options because, in general, as a group males always have more alternatives and power to pursue their own wishes than females have.

    However, I do think it is wrong to try to generalize this way. The real difficulties come from one's inner demons, and I do not think either men or women as a group have it easier on that account. This is something different for every individual.

    If you want some support and want to write to me via e-mail, go to my profile page and click on the part to send a message. You are not pathetic at all -- not yet, anyway. But you will be, if you wallow in self-pity.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Yes. A gay woman is more accepted and the more feminine she looks the better. A mans image is macho as you know and it's not an easy mind set to have a guy act like a woman. If you don't feel comfortable stating that you are gay then don't. It's nobody's business but your own anyway.

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  • ?
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    yes i believe it is harder for a man than a women.. just look at all the porn 90% of it is women on women even when they talk about 3 some it is 2 women and 1 man and no i am straight..happy new years...and when and if you do come out then the people that really love you .. will still love you .. it just may take some time for them to get use to

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  • 1 decade ago

    I think there is more of a stigma when it comes to gay men so yes it can be harder for us to come out. On the other hand though, in regards to my parents, they probably would have took it just as bad if it was my sister instead of me.

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  • 1 decade ago

    I think it is harder for a guy to be gay cuz when a guy is gay it is equated with femininity, which is seen as weakness. Plus, this is a culture dominated by straight guys....what do straight guys find hot? Lesbians. What do straight guys (in general) get grossed out by? Gay guys. Sad, but true.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    More viscious toward males...usually. You can (and at some stage will) survive coming out..but when you're ready. Happy New Year to you too.,

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