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Why bring up your pass relationships all the time to your new mate?

why do people like to talk about their old relationship all the time to new mates ?

Like if you had a problem in your pass relationship and your new mate did it you bring it up not a good thing to do thats only gonna make matters worse... but thats my opinon..

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  • jude
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    perhaps they are still hurt and haven't yet resolved their hurts. maybe they expect u to be more understanding. but really the past needs to be the past, and the more u talk about it, the more the past remains in the present. got to let go of the past after awhile or u will have problems moving into your future. they most likely need a little time, and understanding.

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  • 1 decade ago

    I think it's a way for people to open up and let the new mate understand what has happened. It also lets them know what you will and will not tolerate. Dating is how people get to know each other. If an old boyfriend cheated on you, or if you were raped, etc.. those are important things that mold who you are as a person. Though you shouldn't necessarily dwell on past relationships, they are a part of your past, and shape who you are and how you feel now. If the new mate has a problem with something that you are saying, then you can get out of it earlier. Nobody wants to make the same mistake twice. It's a way to guard yourself against it and let the new person know your expectations.

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  • 1 decade ago

    I believe you learn from past mistakes or atleast you should. I believe your past affects your future. I think you should discuss it for the simple fact that you express where you've been and the desires of your heart is not to go back through that pain and agony. Communication helps in a relationship. Good luck!

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  • 1 decade ago

    I agree I always say at the start of a relationship the past is the past lets keep it there.....everyone I have ever dated only knows what I think they should about my past relationships!!

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  • 1 decade ago

    Maybe that person is not over the hurt and she hurts the one that is the closest to her.

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