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Is this more ruder, or funnier or cornier (lol)?

Warning : this is the rudest sh1t ever"\

1. I wish you were a door so I could slam you all day.

2. Nice legs...what time do they open?

3. Do you work for UPS? I thought I saw you checking out my package.

4. You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?

5. Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?

6. I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

7. I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher: have you seen one?

8. I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on earth tonight.

9. Want to play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me.

10. I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Superdrug, so I could ride you all day long for a quarter.

11. Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag.

12. I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked.

13. Is that a ladder in your stockings or the stairway to heaven?

14. You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty i

Update:

14. You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

15. Are those real?

16. You must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy.

17. I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue.

18. If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.

19. (Look down at your crotch) Well It's not just going to suck itself.

20. You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.

21. You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions?

2

2. F@# me if I'm wrong, but is your name Sherry Titsbottom?

23. Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.

24. My name is (name)...remember that, you'll be screaming it later.

25. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?

26. Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.

27. My friend wants to know if YOU think I'M cute.

28. Hi. The voices in my head told me to come over and ta

Update 2:

plz understand that this doesn't reflect who i am... and let me apologize to the ones who feel offended by this. I am just trying to get a good laugh outta of this (very typical of me lol)

16 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    gross

    rude

    insulting

    funny

    lol!!!

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  • 1 decade ago

    This sounds more like the worlds worst pick up lines heard at a bar!! <shaking head in dispear and shame>

    Thanks for the points.

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  • 4 years ago

    easily, i imagine it truly is slightly of both. the full component about being friends is that real friends can consistently have self assurance one yet another to consistently finally end up on a similar aspect, even once you're saying recommend issues slightly. What he suggested change right into slightly callous if he wasn't kidding, I recommend it sounds like something i might want to assert to someone as a shaggy dog tale yet you sound fairly particular he wasn't kidding. yet besides, the point is, being strong friends does not mean you may want to be ideal to at least one yet another. each so often we get mad and we damage one yet another by coincidence or each so often even on objective. don't have an ego made from glass and make huge deals out of meaningless comments and stress your human beings to make an apology for each little component. in case you may study a thanks to enable the little issues bypass, all of your friendships will be more suitable for it. it style of appears like you already do not ignore that slightly already, so that you're truthfully previous the adulthood of two year previous...! a strong frame of mind even as such issues as this arise is to easily style of deflect it slightly, merely jokingly be like "Psh inspite of Jeff." And smile, so that you position the tone of the engagement--we are merely friends kidding round. yet be careful, if someone is making you experience worse more suitable than they make you experience extra effective, then it truly is the time for a actual communicate--and worst is composed of worst, perhaps to locate someone who will savor you slightly extra effective! existence is merely too short to loaf round with those who're great adverse each of the time.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Haha

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  • Mary W
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    I'm too busy laughing to accept an apology. No need for one anyway.

    hahahahaha :D

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  • 1 decade ago

    I actually think it's kinda funny but it's still really rude and if any one said any of it to me i'd kill them

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  • Taylor
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    Funny..

    Thanks for the points.

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  • 1 decade ago

    thats funny

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  • 1 decade ago

    These are rude! If you think you are going to get a date with these or your attitude toward women you have another thing coming.

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  • 1 decade ago

    this is gross and really funny.

    despair not dispear person above me!

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