When our children are in conflict is what we do, always really the best way to handle the situation ?
When conflicts occur take a step back & watch how you react. Our first impluse is to use authority, to exert control, to nip the fights in the bud. But honestly this doesn't teach children to work out their own differences, instead it teaches them to be totally dependant upon us to resolve their problems, and this dependance is taken into adulthood. Another reaction is to yell at them, "Stop Fighting!!" Rather than listening to see what their real needs are.
To sit back, in laziness is a pitfall in modern day family life. This laziness is the bored irritation that causes someone to yell without listening to attain the required information to help them solve their problems together. Rather than getting dragged into fights with our children,
stop, and mindfully listen, yes listen attentively!
It may be that some bickering gives them the chance to negotiate, and to work things out on thier own. It is o.k. to feel a little irritated.
Our children can teach us Patience & Love !!
- Anonymous1 decade agoFavorite Answer
thank you for such a refreshing and insightful tought. its really nice to hear positive things. i'm sure you helped out a great deal of parents who are faced with this situation.
- mrs.momLv 41 decade ago
What if one is 3 and the other is 1 my three year old is always pushing my one year old and I just don't no how to change this.. We are currently putting him into time outs but is there something else that you think would work better?
- Big BearLv 71 decade ago
I agree that children should learn how to compromise and work problems out, but the very young toddlers don't know how to do this and won't understand it.
What worked for mine was to divert them to another activity or ask them to help me with something else, or involve them all in a game that included me playing with them.
- ErikaLv 44 years ago
omg thank you i'm hoping pep` can examine this its exacly what occurs once I combat with my lil sis !!!!!!!!!!!!!! they only say end battling yet do they ever comprehend what the difficulty isn't any!!!
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- Anonymous1 decade ago
Thanks for the advice,I have to teens they may cripple each other if I dont interveen,but I will give it a shot.
- BobbieLv 41 decade ago
sigh.. wouldn't it be nice if we could control their world??