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I have Been dating for 1 yr. he has been married for 10 years and no kids, I love him, do I stay with him?

I am confussed but very much in love... I want to leave him because I know it's wrong... I've tried and always end up going back... we have so much fun together (skating, sports, dinners etc. our sex is incredible like you could not imagine...) his wife is never home with him they don't have much in common - she's always traveling with her dogs at dog shows and he hates that she does that so often... He told me he's getting a divorce and that he wants to marry me... I know his wife... and she is not a bad person eighter...

31 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    just keep screwing him until either you get caught or he leaves his wife

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  • 1 decade ago

    Hello,

    Wooo lets put the brakes on for a few minutes here. Hun listen I am not sure if you are aware that men who are married will tell you "oh baby I'm getting a divoice" "Im not in love with her, I love you" etc etc.. Please be a little smarter than that, though you may love this man with all your heart if he hasn't left his wife yet then he isn't.

    Stop wasting your life away, time & energy on someone who is married. Have you given any thought to the fact that you've been listening to I'm getting a divoice and you've been with this man for 1 yr? Doesn't that seem a little odd to you?

    He may not be getting his needs met at home and that is something that he and his wife need to discuss. The way this is going since you know his wife is a lot of heartache.Place the shoes on the other foot dear. How on earth do you think you'd feel if it were you (his wife)? No one ever wants to think that way, but give it a thought.

    I do suggest that you tell this man you've enjoyed this fantastic sex, outtings and what not. However this can't go on and that you have some self respect for yourself.When he is fully free from marriage and can show you proof then give you a call.

    Meanwhile for your best interest you need to be with someone that you can be seen with out in public and not hiding for fear of getting caught.

    One thing that you also need to understand, if this man has been married for 10 yrs then he no doubt has a house and other things that have been gotten over those yrs with his wife. Do you actually think that he is going to risk loosing every single thing house, cars and having to possibly pay her money for you? Come on now be serious.

    This is NOT to be mean to you but I just want you to realize whats actually going on in this mans mind! Dear I'm sure he's enjoying the sex but what man wouldn't? I am sure he enjoys your company, but at the end of the day what's he getting from you hun.. more sex.

    Tell me something can you all go out freely in your area? I am guessing no. So you have to go out of town what sort of relationship is that? When hes home with his wife do you think that they are just sitting there looking at each other? Do you think that they are ignoring each other? I say no they are talking, they are having fun and trust me he giving his wife the same pleasure he's giving you.

    Don't believe him when he tells you Oh we don't have sex that stopped years ago. Now you should know that is a lie if there ever was one. The only way I'd say that to be true is if he didn't have a penis and you of course can verfiy that he does have one.

    You need to drop this man like it's hot and get on with your life. Life is far to precious to be wasting it on the notion of a man telling you things he isn't going to do.

    Before I close also give this some thought also if he is cheating on his wife with you what on earth makes you think that IF he marries you ( and I do doubt that, he's telling you a lie!) that he want cheat on you.

    Think hun this shouldn't be hard for you to figure out. Don't be a fool here darling. I beleive that your a smart girl with a lot going for you and attractive so I don't think that you'll have any problems in the men department.

    Best of luck.. but you need to stop this before you end up hurt and this man's wife. (if nothing else why would you want to hurt her.. one day this could be you dear.)

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  • 1 decade ago

    First off, wow. If he hasn't got divorced yet, he's probably never going too. Sorry too be bold, but girl really. And if he married you, you'd probably end up being the girl you are talking about right now (aka if he cheats on her, what is stopping him from cheating on you?). Learn to drink a lot of beer and watch sports like I do, and the men flock. There are a lot of other people in the world that are single, and you'll have a much better conscience.

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  • 1 decade ago

    That's a married man favorite line "I'm going to leave my wife." If he hasn't done it yet, it probably wont. There are no kids involved so that should make leaving so much easier. He is just saying that to get the best of both worlds. Leave him alone and find someone better. Or stick around and be with a married man forever.

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  • JustMe
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    Yeah, he hates what she does but not only has he been married to her for 10 yrs but still is. He's been dating you for a year. He's had plenty of time to divorce her and he hasn't. Remember, if he'll cheat on her he will cheat on you. I'm sure if you two wind up together, some years down the line you'll be back here asking a different question.

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  • 1 decade ago

    You know its wrong...you keep going back, why? If he can cheat on his wife with you what makes you think that he wont do the same thing to you. lol...Open your eyes honey, you are not the first girl that got promised all kinds of great things from a married man. If he really wanted to leave her he would of done it long before you too had been together for a year! Try to put yourself in the wife's shoes.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Think about what you said, it's horrible for him at home and he's going to get a divorce....HMMMMMMmmmmm if so has he filed? probably not, he is using you for poontang, he will never divorce his wife. Why would he ? He has a g/f on the side, You, and he has a wife. Why change anything. He is using you, you need to understand that. I'm sure this not what you want to hear, but get away from this cheater. Think about it, IF he divorces his wife and marries you, is he going to cheat on you???? HMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmm probably.

    If she is not a bad person,, why ARE YOU SCREWING HER HUSBAND? What if things were reversed and he was screwing her while married to you? Get away from this guy, he a liar and a cheater. Find a guy that is not attached.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    remember that what goes around always comes around. if you know it is wrong stop!!! The problem in the first place is that you got yourself with someone that never belonged to you. Feelings got in the way and now you are attached. Even if the husband feels that way is it your job to try to give him what his wife isn't. Tell him to be a man and tell his wife. If he can't take it leave, give her that much respect before cheating. If he wanted you that bad wouldn't he have already left her for you? Think about it

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  • Wow this is a very complicated situation. My advice to you is back up a little, let the guy know how you feel if you haven't, and leave the decision to him. You can't go on forever just having an affair. It's not fair to him, you, or his wife. It sounds like he is holding on to his wife for some reason, maybe you should find out what that reason is. If he is just going to drag you along forever, you should try to let go. No matter what decision you make, it's going to be tough. But just remember that everything takes time & if you follow your heart everything will work itself out.

    Source(s): personal experience
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  • 1 decade ago

    Bad karma is the main reason to leave. If he means it he will leave his wife and be with you, but stay away from the bad karma that this will bring to you. If you do not know what karma is, it is the way the universe pays you back, in good ways and bad. If you are doing this to this woman you say you know and is not a bad person, it will no doubt be done to you, maybe not today or tommorrow but one day and sometimes karma is worse than what you did.

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  • 1 decade ago

    If he is so unhappy in his marriage and it's so great with you, he should have no problem getting a divorce. In the mean time since you can't let go of him why not continue as his mistress for now, show him your love and devotion and their marriage will fall apart on it's own. Most of the time men take longer to figure out what they want. so stick around for a while, see if he has any intention to leave his wife for you. If not, you can decide if you want to leave or continue as his mistress. Make sure you get some financial reward out of this. Your life is basically on hold for him and you need to be taken care of at least by some part, financially. A mistress costs, you know!

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