Should I really even consider thinking that my husband doesnt want kids even though he says "when we have kids
just about every day. I posted a question a little while ago about how I want a child, and someone replied back that he may not want kids, even though he has many times vocalized what he wants to name his children, what he would like the sex of our children to be, amongst other comments? I kind of feel like some people just like to be harsh. What do you think?
- Anonymous1 decade agoFavorite Answer
Don't lose hope! If your husband has actually uttered the phrase "When we have kids..." not just "If we have kids..." then deep down, he does want them. The tricky part is going to be figuring out when "When" is the right time for both of you. He may be having a hard time adjusting to the fact that he does want children; a lot of people nowadays reinforce a self-centered culture by flaunting the fact that they don't have children and can do whatever they please and it intimidates others (who DO want children) into thinking having children is 1. the end of your social life 2. resigning yourself to drudgery and servitude for the next 18 years and 3. not "cool". There are a lot of societal pressures out there negatively influencing child-bearing, and your husband may be exposed to them by his co-workers, friends, or family. Best of luck to you.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Thing is with this forum you are going to get alot of answers you don't care for. Whether the advise is correct or not. You are going to make up your own mind in the end. You might want to have a serious talk with your husband and ask him about when he would like to start a family. Try to come up with some sort of date range that will make you both happy. And if he cant commit to that then you might want to serious think about this, he just might like the idea of kids but not want any himself. Good luck
- 1 decade ago
Has he actually said to you that he doesn't want kids? If not, then I would assume he does based on the other things he says. You should sit down and have an honest talk with him. No one on here knows what he is thinking, only he does.
Tell him that is an important thing in your life and if he doesn't want kids at all, then it isn't fair to you for him to keep dropping hints and leading you on like that. That's just playing with your emotions and is no way to have a marriage.
If you are both fair and really listen to what the other has to say on this topic then you guys should be able to come to understanding and know where to go from here.
Good luck to you!
- 2007Lv 51 decade ago
Why would you rely on what someone on yahoo says over what your husband is saying. He clearly wants kids and your concern might actually be your own hesitation that you are scared to have children. I think you both will have children when you are good and ready so long as you keep up the communication with him.
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- Anonymous1 decade ago
It sounds like you know your husband - and you CERTAINLY know him better than anyone here. You have to remember that everyone here comes from a different life experience - some may have been in relationships where children were never discussed, but it turned out the one person wanted them and one didn't. (I personally know of a least one marriage that has broken up because of this.)
If you're genuinely concerned, just ask him. Othewise, just ignore people who give you answers that you know are irrelevant.