Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 decade ago

why is my husaband such a jerk???Is it a sick joke?

I am about to pop anyday now and he just keeps gripping and being irrational. I hate for our children to see this, the 7yr old really picks up on it. I keep crying because I hurt and he just keeps yeling more **** to do! I am tried of being called fat! I can't wait until this child comes out that he insists is not his. I want my old self back! I am planning on losing 20 lbs and that too. I love him so much, I just can't take his crap. He is so moody!!

he tells me he won't respect me until I shut up andrespect him. Maybe I do sqwack too much... I just can't hold it in. Everything irritates me...

He keeps saying he never wanted this baby, (which is totally a lie, he said he had to have one more with or without my help). That I just should have never got off the birth control and kept my legs closed. And he doesn't think this is his child, (he said that with our other son too, now you couldn't pry him out of his arms). He loves to twist up my mind and cause drama. HELP!

31 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Why the F**K are you with the a**hole! He is obviously verbally abusive and has no morales or respect. You deserve better and so do your children. You should leave his a**, run as far away as possible. Otherwise you are teaching your children that it is okay for a man to treat women that way. Grow a spine and do what is right for you and your children.

  • 1 decade ago

    honey this guy is an a**hole and thinks that tearing you down will make him feel better. He is on a power trip and keeps on verbALly abusing you. You never know but this could turn physical. Get paternity tests once your other one is born and for the one that is his but he says isn't and prove to him he is the father and he needs to stop this attitude. His boys are seeing him be such a jerk they are picking up on it and they could turn out the same way. He needs to grow up and be a man. I am so sorry your husband acts this way! I hope it gets resolved. IT is not a sick joke he is a A**Hole!! I know you love him and I know that you wanna make it work so do what you can but if he is going to put you and your children in harms way he needs to go. I mean you are 9 months pregnant of course you are going to be heavier then when you were not have another baby coming. I wish you all the luck!

  • 1 decade ago

    I have been through the same thing. My husband however, does this when he has been drinking alot. He starts yelling and throwing things and does not seem to care where the kids are. I am not pregnant like you, but I have come to realize that I can not continue to live in this environment. My children are being affected by it also. In time you will see your children doing the same type of behaviour. I have noticed it in my 6 yr old. I am making my plans to provide a better environment. I know it isn't easy to leave, but you need to just get away from him. Maybe then he will see how is behaviour is hurting every one. It doesn't help to yell back at him, in fact, it just adds more stress. Just walk away until he calms down. If he doesn't, make plans to keep walking.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    To paraphrase the advice of most answers above mine, "If the marriage isn't perfect, leave." Well, uh, whatever happened to "for better or for worse"? Pregnancies are obviously difficult on your husband, stressful. Increased stress causes moodiness in a lot of people. Increased moodiness often results in poor judgment and a decline in interpersonal skills. You, too, are overreacting to the stress he is putting on you, probably (understandably) due to pregnancy hormones: "everything irritates me" is a clear expression of overreaction to stress. You have been through this before, with your older son. You weathered that storm and things were fine until this pregnancy. So, weather this storm too, knowing that things will go back to normal soon. In the meantime, be sure to formulate a STRONG birth control plan for the future, because you would do well to make this your last pregnancy.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Oh, honey! I really feel for you and know exactly what you are going through. I have 3 sons too and my husband can be a JERK. You don't have to take the emotional abuse because that's what it is pure and simple. What a horrible SOB! I know it's hard not to cry but don't give him the satisfaction. Don't let him break you and find a counselor or someone from your church (if you have one) to talk to and let others know what's going on. You must! It's for your sake and for you sons' well being to stay grounded even when you feel like you can't go on. Also document all of this in case you need proof of his mistreatment should you end up divorcing him. Man, life is too short to be so unhappy but you're kind of trapped like I was/am because of children, financial reasons, etc. I will pray for you and hope that you'll be given the strength you need to get through the abuse. Turn all of your attention to your kids and for the wee baby who is to be born soon. I am so, so sorry for your situation but you CAN rise above it.

    Source(s): my own experience with my husband
  • 1 decade ago

    I am sorry you are going through all of this right now when you need him the most. He is not just what you call him a "jerk". He is also insensitive, selfish, irrational, abusive, disrespectful and I could go on but I don't have the time now. Tell him that RESPECT is something we earned. I feel that your children and you are in an environment NOT suitable for them and they are going to learn this behavior. Thus causing more pain to someone else. Please think about putting a stop to this. Remember one thing: PEOPLE GET AWAY WITH WHAT YOU LET THEM.

  • 1 decade ago

    You're a little more emotional than normal because your pregnant.

    That doesn't mean he's not being a jerk - it just means that it bugs you more, and you're more likely to react to it ("I just can't hold it in")

    He's nervous and moody too. Can you guys afford this new baby? Do you have room for it? Is his job secure?

    If everything else seems okay except him and his bad attitude, there's only one thing left to say...

    Of all the men on the planet, this is the one you chose.

    Who can you blame?

  • 1 decade ago

    You should talk to your husband and try to calm things down until you have the baby. It sounds like you're both stressed out and need to stop fighting. Stop yelling at him and tell him to stop insulting you. He should be taking care of you right now. I'm sure you always take care of him and the kids, let him do it for a little while. Whether he wanted the baby or not, it's almost here. Deal with it.

  • 1 decade ago

    Ditch him. He's being WAY emotionally abusive to you, and you and your children do not deserve it. there a chance that this is your hormones going crazy, too? I was pregnant not that long ago, and I know how that can be. Sometimes men get the crazy pregnancy hormones too.

    I guess the best thing you could do is wait for the baby to come. If within say, two months, things do not change, then ditch him.

  • 1 decade ago

    The most important thing right now is the health of you and your children. You don't need that kind of abuse whether you're pregnant or not. Not to mention the effect his behavior has on your children. You may not realize it but children copy the action of their parents. What they see is what they learn. Do you really want your children to grow up in this environment and grow up to treat their spouses the same way? He sounds like is very selfish. He reminds me of my ex-husband. Take it from experience both you and your children will prosper better out of this environment.

  • kozel
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    A blonde, brunette, and a pink head were status on the fringe of the pool able for the basically hundred yead breast stroke race.... The starter shot the pistol and the three dove into the water and began swimming. a short at the same time by way of very truth the brunette finished and jumped out of the water. Then the pink head. about twenty minutes later, the blonde emerged. They presented the gold to the brunette, the silver to the pink head and the bronze to the blonde. As they positioned the metallic round her neck the blonde wispered " i do not pick to sound like a sore loser, in spite of the easy incontrovertible truth that I evaluate different 2 used their hands"

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