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For those who have experienced a miscarriage...?

How long did it take you to come to terms with your loss??

12 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    I had a miscarriage 2 yrs ago in march..I was carrying twins and I lost them at 19 wks and 4 days...Im still not totally ok with it everytime the due date for them comes along I get a little sad..I have then since had a daughter and I think that helped out a lot but your gonna have good days and bad days...just dont rush the grieving process let it go and when your ready to come to terms with it you will...It takes some time though...Im not fully at terms with it yet,,but its getting better and it will for you too I promise

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  • 1 decade ago

    I know not everyone will have the same expierence as me but I had a miscarriage when I was 17 years old. It was hard on me but in all it was probably for the best. I had mine at 5 weeks so it's not like the whole "pregnancy" thing had even really sunk in. I was still upset though because I felt like I had done something wrong. But the truth is everything happens for a reason and once you realize what that reason is you will finally be able to except the fact. My reason is I now have two of the most beautiful babies in the world.

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  • 4 years ago

    I had a miscarriage around this time final twelve months. First, each thing grow to be going positive, and then hastily I felt like something grow to be very incorrect. there grow to be no longer something initially that could desire to have made me think of i grow to be having a miscarriage different than my gut. the subsequent morning i began out bleeding and it grow to be kinda like the era blood on the final day or so of your era. So I went to the scientific expert, for here couple of days they examined my hormone stages and that they've been nevertheless going up the way the could. possibly 5 days after my preliminary feeling i began out having cramps that have been very resembling the way i think as quickly as I get a pap, the cramping bigger over here couple of hours so I went to the ER the place they shown a miscarriage. that's my very own adventure yet anybody is diverse, some women individuals have miscarriages early on that are painless and that they each now and then do no longer even understand they have been pregnant first of all

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I have never gotten over it, and I have 4 perfect children, but I always wonder about my baby. At first I couldn,t deal with it at all, but now 10 years later, I don't think about it all the time. When I do though if I need to cry that is what I do. You have experienced a true loss, let your self mourn. Don't try to bottle up the way you feel, no matter how you feel. You are going to feel pain and anger and that is all right. If you acknowledge and deal with your feelings you will slowly start feeling better again, but you will still think about your loss from time to time. That is a good thing though this was your baby and you would never want to forget them, and they deserve to have that place in your heart, no matter how much it hurts to visit that place in your heart. So Sorry for Your Loss.

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  • J
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    I became pregnant again 10 weeks after suffering my miscarriage, but don't think I came to terms with that loss until I held my son in my arms. If I hadn't lost my first baby the course of my life would have been different and my son would never have been.

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  • 1 decade ago

    My deepest sympathy to you. Mine was 13 years ago and I still think about it. You will come to terms with and understand that (no matter who your God is) God does things for mysterious reasons. I know that is not very consoling, but a miscarriage is a way to send children with severe health problems back to heaven.

    Again I am so sorry, and this reasoning is the only way I could face my miscarriage.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Mine was at about 6-8 weeks, stress related.

    Took me a couple months to get over the shock. After that i've been fine. Theres nothing I can do to change it. And I fully believe I will be with that baby in eternity, so theres no reason to make myself miserable and ruin my health and life for the children I will have still.

    Theres still times that I get upset that I lost one. Especially since it was stress caused by my aunts family over something trivial. Ive never even told them what they did, and how their hateful actions effected the rest of the family. I think thats what bothers me the most. Families are supposed to love, not cause death.

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  • 1 decade ago

    I experienced one (strange one) last year. (Long story short, I'd miscarried one of twins, but we didn't know I was carrying twins at the time, so, I found out at twenty weeks that not only was I pregnant "again", but I was "still" pregnant). I miscarried at six weeks in the beginning of November, four days after I found out I was pregnant, right after we'd basically told everyone.

    Anyway, I didn't come to terms with the loss for a few months. I was very upset for a couple of weeks after I was told I'd miscarried. I mean, crying randomly, feeling sort of numb sometimes, getting angry at my husband for no reason, etc. for a good couple of weeks. I felt very guilty because I hadn't known I was pregnant (I have irregular periods, and actually had my period about five times throughout my 41 week pregnancy), and, as we were in the middle of a military move, we'd spent the previous couple of weeks mostly hanging out in our empty apartment drinking. I blamed myself. I blamed my husband; I blamed everyone and everything, and I was angry and sad and confused. I've always been able to do anything I put my mind to, but I couldn't carry a baby? What kind of a woman was I? Yeah, I beat myself up for a couple weeks. Slowly, it got better; I took a new job, kept myself somewhat busy, obsessively searched out info everywhere (I'm a person who feels better knowing things; others don't like to dwell on it, others like to talk about it to everyone; whatever works for you). I found out I was "again" pregnant in mid-January. I was terrified until I went to the doctor, scared I'd miscarry again, as I thought I was only a few weeks along. It was only when I found out I was actually 20 weeks along that I calmed down, since I was past the "danger" zone.

    I've come to terms...but I do sometimes wonder what Katie's twin would have been like.

    Blessings to you and yours.

    Source(s): Personal experience.
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  • 1 decade ago

    Well, while I have accepted my loss, I don't think I'll ever be over it. It helped that I got pregnant again right afterwards, although I was terrified of losing another baby. Finally, around 4 months later, my doctor said that you really don't want to hold on to the pregnancies that miscarry, because it's an indication that something was seriously wrong.

    I'm still sad for the child that I lost, but it helps to think that it was my now 9-month-old's guardian angel, who had to go to heaven so that he or she could watch over his/her little sister.

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  • 1 decade ago

    I don't know if I ever really did. I lost my mind for about a week, and then I forgot about it for a year. Really! The experience left my mind for about a year. When I did start remembering, I just carried on with life like nothing happened, because at the time, I belonged to a church that would have treated me badly if they knew that I had premarital sex.

    I am now married, I left that church many years ago, and the experience is 15 years behind me, but I still don't know what to think of it.

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