JOJO asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 decade ago

my mom dosn't like my fiancee?

My fiancee is a good man. He works hard and treats me like a queen. The problem is that my mom hates him. Every time I mention going somewhere with him she gets mad and I won't even begin to tell what happens when I start talking about the wedding. I'm 17 so I still live with mom and I can't leave untill next december. How do I make mom realize I'm in love and that she will just have to deal?

Update:

My fiancee is 19. for those who are wondering

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    My mom didn't like mine either. But I loved him and married him anyway when we were 17 & 18. Everyone said it wouldn't last but we've been married now for 45 yrs. & she still doesn't like him. Too bad.

  • 1 decade ago

    17 is pretty young to have a fiance. I would bet that it is not HIM that your mother has a problem with, but the fact that you are "engaged" at such a young age. She probably knows how the odds are against this marriage lasting. She does not want to see you divorced, and alone (and possibly moving back in with her) when you are 20 and have a child or two. When this marriage ends, I don't want my tax money supporting you, when you are being told now that this is a huge mistake, unless you are planning to wait about 10 years to marry, AND plan on not having sex until then so you don't have unplanned children. She loves you and wants what is best for you. Listen to her.

  • 1 decade ago

    Your mom wants what is best for you! Is this man older than you? Maybe, she feels like you are being taken advantage of by this man. Since your under age and still live with your mom, you need not to talk about your fiance' in front of her! But, take a good look at yourself! Are you ready to get married? You are a little young and unexperienced with life! Just realize your mom is looking out for you and give her a break! Plus, your mom does not have deal with your engagement until you are out of HER house and supporting yourself!

    Source(s): mom of 2
  • 1 decade ago

    17 is so young to have a fiancee! I'm not trying to advocate you leaving him. But maybe your mother being upset with this is a sign. You're 17! You should be doing teenager stuff. No, not the crap you see on Laguna Beach. But be young. Have fun. Enjoy your youth while you still can.

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  • 1 decade ago

    I believe the biggest problem is your age. It could be any man in your life and she would still be worried. I would suggest having a long engagement. Don't rush things. If you do marry this man, it will take years for you to have your Mother like him. And it still may not happen at all. Your relationship with your Mother changes as you get older. Sometimes for the better and sometimes things will not go well.

    I suggest you wait a while before you marry your man.

  • 1 decade ago

    Unfortunately you are under age for most states. That means that you have to follow your mother's reasonable requests until you are of consenting age. However one way to help your mother fall in love with him would be for him to show her what he is about. Have him help your mother with things that needs to be done (ask him to comply first) and she may warm up to him. There is also a phenomenon about mothers being very overly protective and have a tough time to "cut the cord". But seeing that you are still 17, you should wait until next December before making any final plans.

  • 1 decade ago

    you are only 17, why would you want to get married so young? If he really loves you and you love him why not wait to make sure things work out. At that age couples have not experienced enough to be truly faithful to each other. They always seem to stray. You should really wait. I'm sure that is your moms problem.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Guess what. You are one year away from legal independence. Point blank, who you want to f*** is your business and no one elses. She needs to grow up and get over it. Girl, don't even worry about it. Dismiss the wedding to her totally. Don't talk about it to her, don't even mention his name. Act obsolete to anything negative she has to say about him. Once she sees you really don't give a f*** what she thinks, she lighten up. Let her know too that if need be you will have to cut her off a little bit because you are about to be in a new ballpark. I don't mean be negative but ease off her a little, start spending less time at home and call less. Trust me, she'll get it and wise up real quick. I don't understand what her issue is. You are grown. DO YOU FOR YOU.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    17???? Hmm. well before coming up with a plan of action to make your mom love him, wait and see if you love him or if he's even still around next december.

  • 1 decade ago

    it's not up to your mum to decide is it? you are 17 now and you are a grown woman you should talk to yuor mum and make her realise that you and your fiancee love each other. would you rather be with him and be happy or be with someone that your mum likes but makes you feel unhappy? it's your choice but nothing comes between true love

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