My Parents are driving me crazy! HELP!?
Ok so here is the deal I am 24 and live at home with my parents and my daughter. I realize that they are doing me a favor by letting me live there. I try hard to obtain privacy and raise my daughter on my own terms, however my parents tend to get in the way. I have been nice and have asked them to approach me with comments or concerns about my daughter. I ask them nicely not to say or do certain things, however, they continue to do them. I have never had a great relationship with my mother and she is the worst out of the two of them. She often teaches my daughter to hide things from me! I am a senior in college and when I graduate and get a better paying job I plan on moving, until then I have no choice but to live with them. Talking doesnt seem to work with these two, please any advice would be greatly appreciated!!! Thank You :-)
- travelingirl005Lv 51 decade agoFavorite Answer
Breath and Breath more, remember lamaze training. One year left and now you can start counting down..
You've already spoke with your parents and you are not seeing a change and probally won't. My mother once told me...your laws are your laws however with Nana they can do and be spoiled and then I send them home to you...she said this with a smile and we hugged...knowing that Grandma got to be the cool one after raising her own children and dealing with all the rules years ago. I call it stubborness they call it living their way. lol
I don't know how old your daughter is. However whatever her age maybe, try to talk to her and explain that you are a team together. Secrets aren't good, someone will always get hurt. Thats not how a team works. Mom and daughter are to share everything. If you won't have trust with one another.How can you trust her and if you kept secrets would she trust you? I would emphasize on that as much as you can.
Maybe trying your mother one more time telling her that you want her to be close with your daughter however if she is teaching her to hide things what will it be like when you move on and out and youre alone with your daughter. Explain that could cause major problems as your daughter growns into a young adult.
Wishing I could say more.....don't give up...You can do it! Just like you are with your education...You Go Girl!
Think positive and Breath.........................:O)
Heres to 2007 and News Beginnings!
- puzzledLv 51 decade ago
You are at the age when you want nothing to do with your parents you want to break free of them and live your own life that is as it should be. But you need to tough it out and let them help you get your education finished and get a good start in life so you don't have to rely on them in the future. Please take a moment to think about how much your parents love you and they only want what is best for you. It is very hard especially for mothers to let their children go even at your age your mother is still trying to protect you from the hard knocks life gives us all. I am sure you do everything you can to keep your daughter safe and happy and that will never change no matter how old she gets. At some point in the future you will look back on this time and you will understand your mother better I know this because you are already a mother. Maybe if you just think each day if not for my mother I could not have done this important thing today. No matter how angry you are at her please let her know how much you love and appreciate her that might be what she needs to calm her down a little bit. There will be a lot of days in your future believe it or not when any problem you have would be easier if only your mother were there. You're not expected to know all this yet it comes with age but the better you handle this situation now the better you will like yourself later. Good Luck
- 1 decade ago
Unfortunately, I think you're stuck between a rock and a hard place. I think your best option is to have a heart to heart with the parent you are closest to. Tell them how much you care and how much you appreciate all they are doing for you, but at the same time you need some space to raise your daughter. See if your father can have some influence over your mother in this situation... but don't go in aggressively. Let them know how much you appreciate them first.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
yea there is always shelters for woman w/kids you should have had your own place before the baby was born now you are at the part of reaping what you sow im more than sure you have been talked to zillions of times about having a child out of wedlock if the father is around and able to keep your daughter then allow him those rights until you get your own no matter how much of a pain you may think your parents are plz be grateful for them in life they can have a lot more kids but in life you cant have more parents its there house you just have to do what you didnt do as a teen which is listen and obey gl with your life 10 commandments honor and obey your parents pray for them as well as your situation
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- 1 decade ago
Contact neighborhood centers, you may qualify for free or reduced daycare. Some people frown on daycare. My kids loved it. They would cry on Saturday mornings when they couldn't go. The have alot of fun and play all day with kids their own age. Try to get it worked out. Spend time outside the home doing things together. There are alot of free or inexpensive places to go. Then don't come home until bedtime. If you study late post a notice for late night study buddy with kids. Then you could meet at their place.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Because these are your parents you are in a f***ed up predicament. Your only choice here is to move out and be free of them. The reality of it is that this is their house and they are going to do whatever anyway. That's the breaks when you are living with people. Or stick it out until you make your move. If you stick it out, you'll have more motivation to push yourself to get the hell up out of there. As far as the baby goes, they are going to think that they know more than you because they raised you. So, be patient, pray and KEEP YOUR COOL. Do not let them have the satisfaction of pulling you off your square and putting you on the street. Stand your ground and be firm but be easy too. I hope and pray you reach your goals and always remember to PRAY and KEEP YOUR COOL. Keep your head up for your baby girl.Source(s): I am a living example of living with other people. I grew up in the commonwealth of Pennsylvania. Parents died when I was 6 and 11 years old. Dad went first, Mom went next. So I feel your pain.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Take your daughter in confidence (I don't know how old is she, she must be old enuf to understand to hide things from you). Tell the kid, that you are her best friend and act like one too. Whenever your kid says something against you, tell her that whoever told her that, you are going to confront them in front of her, this will insist on honesty and gaining friendship and anytime just give her the best behaviour when in front of your parents. Just keep the best buddy attitude. I wish you all the luck!
- Michelle MLv 41 decade ago
It sounds like you've put up with it for a long time so what's another year until you graduate. I know that this is a huge issue for you but it's almost over. Maybe you could tell your dad your problems and let him discuss it with your mom. Maybe you could at least have one other person on your side. Good luck!
- INDRAG?Lv 61 decade ago
How old is your daughter? Try talking to HER and explaining, the best way you can, how things are right now, and how they will be better soon. You mother is not going to listen to you, so just try to reach your daughter (counter attack!). Keep the peace, for her sake.
- Mrs. BrownLv 51 decade ago
You sound like me 4 years ago. I moved back in with my parents when I found out i was pregnant with my son. Unfortunately nothing will change until you move out i moved out of my parents house 4 years ago and things are better.