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my 2 yr old lets off this awful scream, on occasion. sometimes its deafening. people may think that .......?

i'm torturing him. the screaming session can last for quite awhile .he usally does it for no appparent reason. i.ve recentlyy stopped giviving him breast milk which he absoltely loved. its just the screaming how do i deal with it? do i just let him get on with it or what. its really hard

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    He is using the scream to get to you. Ignore him as if you can't hear him. If at home, go to another room and just ignore him. This is what they mean when they say "terrible two's" . Your child has found a way to get to you. Don't let them see you loose it. When the screaming stops, wait a minute or so, then give your attention back. If ignoring doesn't help, tell them you don't answer fits. Tell the child they can have your attention when they become a child again. Right now, the ACTION is making them look like a monster. Be sure they know it's the action and not the child.

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  • 1 decade ago

    I'm pretty sure it's normal at that age. My son is almost 18mos now and has started the ear-splitting screams just recently, too. He seems to do it when he wants my attention or is just really energetic. I think he likes the way it sounds!

    When I'm home I mostly ignore him when he's screaming, and immediately give him attention if he quiets down, so that he relates being more quiet to getting my attention. It's hard, because the screams are actually a little painful sometimes.

    If we're in public I try to distract him into doing something more quiet. What works for him most of the time is I will put my fingers to my lips and Shh because he likes to mimic that gesture, and we put our heads close together and whisper and giggle, or make animal noises together.

    Try not to worry what people think. Those who have kids will know that it's his age and not your fault.

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  • 1 decade ago

    WELCOME TO THE STAGE OF THE "TERRIBLE TWO'S "!!!

    lol! This is normal..at this age they are just trying to assert their own Independence...but they are still "baby" enough to think that the WHOLE WORLD still revolves around THEIR wants and needs!!! This is probably his form of rebelling from the change from breast milk, just as you thought...it is disturbing (to you and others) but normal behavior for him.

    The best thing you can do is just ignore him if you know that he is not hurting...and if you are in a public place (and they usually are!) that is part of "your punishment!" lol! try to remove him from the "scene" and just stay calm...and let him scream!!!

    If he is hungry, offer him a snack...if it a time when he USED to get breast milk...offer him a cup of milk...

    He will soon learn that this screaming tactic will not work to get his way with mommy...but be for warned...just as you figure this one out...he WILL come up with a new tactic!!! lol!

    That is what two year olds are all about!!!

    And..just when you think you (finally!) have conquerred ALL of his "tactics" you will then be entering the world of the "tremendous three's"...then you will have the "fantastic four's"...the "fabulous five's"....starting to get the message?!!? lol!

    Just keep a good pair of tennis shoes handy...because "the race"

    has just begun!!!!

    Now...a word of advise....when you are at your "wits end"...remember...all of these stages will be WONDERFUL memories and stories to tell your grandchildren some day...they just LOVE to hear what "mommy" or "daddy" did when they were little!!!

    Enjoy this time of your life...they grow up and away all too quickly!!!

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  • KC
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    Toddlers will do anything and everything to get their way, and they know no shame or limits. You must take charge of the situation or he will run all over you.

    If it happens in public, calmly but firmly remove him from the situation (store, restaurant, park wherever) until he calms down. This may be horribly inconvenient at times, but taking him outside or in the car until he calms down will reduce the audience and make his tactic less effective. He will also start to understand he will miss out on things if he does this. Onlookers will see a Mom considerately taking charge of her child - and dont' worry, sympathy for you will be the most common reaction.

    If he does this at home, put him in time-out and go do something else. Let him scream until he gets tired of it, but don't give him his way. Just look bored and don't get upset.

    Once he realizes that this behavior is not only ineffective but unacceptable, he'll drop it. I know it's hard, but hang in there. It's just a phase, and he'll grow out of it. Good luck!

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  • Summer
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    Honey, I'm in the same boat as you. When my 3 1/2 year old (girl) doesn't get her way, she lets out this gut-wrenching scream. Almost as if someone is beating the daylights out of her (when she screams like that, I want to beat the daylights out of her!). Plain and simple: he's getting a reaction out of you when he does that. You probably go, "stop that!" or "quit screaming!" or maybe you even throw your hand over his mouth. He's getting what he wants: attention. Kids, especially toddlers, will take any type of attention you give them, positive or negative. I would ignore it for as long as possible. If you're out in public, people will look at the kid like they're crazy for screaming for no reason. That's how they look at Chloe. People just smile at me (like I'm crazy for not doing anything) and go on their merry-ole-ways. My daughter sees that she's not getting a rise out of me and sees that nobody is paying attention to her.

    On the lines of taking him off of breast milk recently, meet him in the middle.... give him chocolate milk. Breast milk is very sweet because it's got a lot of natural sugars in them. Just make sure he drinks a little water afterwards (to prevent sugars sitting on his little teeth).

    You need to explain to him that the special milk he used to have came from mommy's body and God (or whatever reason you want to use) is not letting Mommy have any milk anymore. That he is a big boy now, and he has to start behaving like one. Screaming and carrying on will not get him what he wants, especially if it's out of Momma's control. You can give him something just as tasty: chocolate milk. It's sweet and yummy. Kids understand a lot more than we act like they do.

    Last-ditch effort: if he's having a fit, put him in a "quiet chair" (timeout) until he stops screaming. My daughter HATES her quiet chair. It sits in the living room, away from the TV, but where she can still see us doing what we want and know we're watching TV or whatever. She shuts up real fast because her timeout doesn't start until she stops screaming. Then, after she stops, I give her 3 minutes (since she's 3). When her timeout's over, I ask her why she was screaming so much. She tells me and we talk about it. Then I tell her to apologize to me for acting the way she acted. And to Daddy, too. She's to the point now where she will apologize (and mean it) without me having to tell her to do it. Timeouts are few and far between anymore.

    Good luck!

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  • 1 decade ago

    oh, i feel your pain, hon. unfortunately this is just one of those things that 2 year olds do, just be glad that him screaming is the only problem. i have 2 2 year old girls, and they go through phases when they're very mean to each other while at home. they will hit and bite each other leaving really bad bruises, to the point that their daycare director has approached me several times asking where all the bruises are comming from. i'm so embarrassed, and i explain to her how they act at home, but i'm scared she's not believing me.

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  • gove
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    I accept as true with nameless. that is alright to enable her throw her tantrum, besides the indisputable fact that, positioned her someplace secure the position she will be able to be faraway from anybody. in case you supply her interest at the same time as she's doing it, she'll proceed the habit because she knows she'll get interest. once she's calm, mind-set her and tell her that throwing a mood tantrum isn't ideal and that she desires to apply her "large words" at the same time as she needs some thing. yet continually supply her a hug and tell her that you want her. She desires to carry close that you do care, yet received't positioned up with that habit. desire this facilitates!

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    when he starts screaming pick him up, and put him in his room, and shut the door. He is just doing it to get some attention from you, my 2 1/2 year old used to do the same thing. The worst thing you can do is react to it. Just shut the door on him, and he will get the point that he has noone to get attention from if nobady can see or hear him.

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  • 1 decade ago

    these screams are obviously due to pain in the extreme. see your pediatrician or doctor it could be serious. like an ear infection or strep throat, it could also be indigestion or milk allergy. Try soy milk.

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