Why is my Husband so Emotional?
all he wants to do is talk about how i hurt him..stuff in the past..now we both have past hurts a lot of stuff went on..that is why i am seperated today...but that all he does is text me and call me only to complain...i listen to him but dang it's one thing after another...i feel a lot too but i'm trying to let bye gones be bye gones why can't he just start over fresh....everyday it's something that happen......it's not helping me come back i feel like filing for divorce
if he can't forgive...i have forgiving him for puting his hands on me more than once and all his verbal abusive...since i left he acts like he's the good one i don't know...we've both messed up i just couldn't deal with it anymore.....and by him being emotional get mad and fustrated and impatient does not help me.
- Anonymous1 decade agoFavorite Answer
If he has abused you, you need to stay away from him. The ONLY way you should ever go back to him is if he AND you gets professional guidance and counseling. If he doesn't go for that, that is a definite sign that he is not willing to work on his problems and that he blames you for HIS abusing YOU. That just is not a healthy, sane mind.
DO NOT put yourself in a dangerous situation. And that IS exactly what abuse is. It is a DANGEROUS SITUATION.
Start a new life for yourself. And some counseling for yourself would be a very good idea. You don't want to repeat patterns and end up with yet another abuser.
Be strong for yourself. Good luck. :)
- 1 decade ago
Try apologizing for everything and letting him know exactly how you feel. Although you may not have been the only person doing wrong, sometimes you have to sacrifice to rebuild. I definitely advise you to see a marriage counselor and keep the lines of communication open. Listen to the things that he is complaining about and let him know that you are working on never hurting him again, but you want the same commitment from him. Don't go back and forth with complaints because that will not solve anything. Be the bigger man and apologize and try to start fresh. If that doesn't work dump him because it could get worse later down the line. Good luck and God bless.
- 1 decade ago
You answered your question already How he is hurt. Try wearing his shoes and feel like he feels. Why are you still talking to him? arAre you working on getting back together if you are you already see you will have a problem anyone still talking about the past hasn't forgiven you yet. You will have very big trust issues. You both need time to heal.It's going to take more than arguing on the phone when you separate to start fresh.He sounds like he has anger issues also that is not good for the relationship. Have you ever try to go on with your life. One thing is you can't change him he has to want to change. You are also verbal abusing him also or are you speaking calmly on the phone.Remember why you separated and ask yourself why are you on the phone with the person that agree to separated in the first place.Evaluate you and stop letting people stress you out forgive and be happy for you sanity and health.Sometimes we jump in marriages for the wrong reasons. Not communicating about what you expect from that person and what you want from that person. You see things and you continue to marry them because of love, love is patience endurance,strenght, understanding forgiving, not controling, not jealous or evil, etc. Evil look up that word people think they no what it mean. Your relationship needs lots of help please pray and ask the lord to give you wisdom to get things back in order. God bless you
- GrnAplLv 61 decade ago
He needs to hear you accept responsibility and not share blame. He also needs to quit harping on the past. Speak with him about this. Tell him that you are sorry and would like to move on with him but he isn't making it easy by dredging it all up and reopening the emotional injury. If he is unable to stop then it may be best for you both to go your seperate ways permanently.
This will open the door for him to either stop and then you can work on your marriage (which won't be easy) or you can just start over again. However, being seperated isn't the way to establish trust and overcome betrayal (no matter what kind).
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- DelKLv 71 decade ago
Unfortunately, it sounds very much as though he's trying to manipulate you into "submission" so he can continue his abuse of you. He doesn't feel he has sufficient power in the present circumstances. You sound as though you are in a much better frame of mind as you recognize SOMETHING is going on that isn't healthy. From your description, it's likely you'll both need some big league help to eliminate the abuse in your relationship.
- Lovebug123Lv 51 decade ago
He's an abuser, and now he feels lost because he has no control over you. You should stay on the path of wanting to file for divorce. Your life is turning in the right direction.
- 1 decade ago
>FIRST FIND OUT IF UR HUSBAND HAD SOME PROBLEMS IN THE CHILDHOOD OR AT SOME POINT IN HIS LIFE. DO NOT TALK TO HIM ABOUT THIS BUT THIS'LL HELP U UNDERSTAND HIM BETTER
> TALK TO HIM OPENLY...TELL HIM U LOVE HIM AND U CAN NOT LIVE WITHOUT HIM AND THIS IS NOT HOW U PPL ARE SUPPOSED TO LIVE...TELL HIM U GUYS ARE SUPPOSED TO HAVE A HAPPY LIFE JUST THE TWO OF U AND NO ONE ELSE....TELL HIM U WANNA TALK ABT THE PROBLEMS N BE WITH HIM FOREVER....
> TALK TO HIM ACCEPT UR MISTAKES...HE'LL 4GIVE U...FORGIVE HIS MISTAKES N B TOGETHER PEOPLE DON RUIN UR LIVES...GOD BLESS...
- ANU ULv 51 decade ago
Look dear, if he complains dont answer him. Tell him frankly that you will talk to him only when he talks nicely .Think a lot before filing for a divorce.
- Anonymous1 decade ago