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Problem with family?

Ever since my mom and dad divorced, OUr family has split up and we couldn't have a good christmas this year. My mom has no family in California, they are all in Mexico. My dad, on the other hand, has almost all of his family around him and they all gang up on my mom and make her feel bad. I had to choose who i wanted to spend christmas with and that made christmas feel like crap to me. If I choose my mom, my dad gets really depressed. If I choose my dad, my mom gets depressed. If you were in my situation, who would you choose?

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    i am sorry that you were in this situation. like you said, you are in a lose-lose situation and whichever you chose you will leave one of your parents disappointed. have you already made the decision? if yes, what did you chose?

    do you have any siblings? maybe you can go with one parent and your sibling with the other to makes things better for both of them and so no one is left alone. if you don't have any siblings, then personally I would chose my mom, because she is probably the one going through the most since she does not have family in CA. And well you dad will manage to do okay, since he has family support around him. But this is a hard decision, but do it is not your fault. what does your gut tell you to do? whichever you chose, show both of your parents that you love them equally, by telling them that for the next christmas they will spent it with them... and just tell them that it is a hard decision for you bc you love them both and ideally would want to be with both of them. i hope you feel better, and if this christmas was hard for you, do not worry, things will look better in the future. promise. but to answer your question, i would be with my mom.

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  • 1 decade ago

    I would choose my mom. I know what you mean kinda of like the same thing with my family. My dad's relatives almost always used to spend Chrismas and all holidays with us but since one of them got together with someone else....that has changed. They all went to my uncle and his "wife's" house this Christmas and Thanksgiving too. Christmas didn't feel the same. But my mom is way more important to me than just relatives especially if they are going to gang up on her....I rather be there for her.

    One more thing your dad should stand up for his FAMILY and not make you choose. Your dad and mom should both spent Christmas with you.

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  • RJ2K1
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    Don´t choose. Share ! This what love is all about. Sharing with all of your heart and mind. It makes you strong and powerful. You´re the one. Your are the key to keeping the peace. Look. There is no guarantee in life . It´s not your fault that you came on this planet,but this isn´t any reason to become depressed. Learn while you´re going through this process. Believe me; you´re going to need this gained Experience in your own future Relationships ! Knowledge is Power !!!!!!

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  • 1 decade ago

    Go be with your Mom and tell your Dad you did not want her to be alone. Divorce is difficult and it makes for a really sad X-mas when it is spent alone. If your Dad does not like the idea, tell him he raised you to do the right thing and you feel she does not need to be alone on X-mas. Good Luck and Merry X-mas!

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  • 1 decade ago

    I feel ya. I had the same situation when I was young, and there is no good answer. Maybe you try explaining to both of them just how selfish, and un-fair they are being to you. I don't know if this would be an option for you or not, but when I was 13, and this happened to me I rebelled, locked myself in my room and had them come to me, until they came to their senses.

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  • 1 decade ago

    You better ask your dad and mom that, how much you missed all the moments with both of them at the same time.Let them understand that you are missing both of them , it is not they missing you. Ask them it is their "will" or "you" need in there life?

    Tell them if they were together, you would have enjoyed the christmass and newyear and birthdays together as a family like that of other kids. You have to make them understand how much you miss both and make them live together ( in case if they have not married to anyone yet.) and inculding you too as a family.

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  • grandm
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    Your mother, she has no family, while your father does. Or, you could see if your mother would be willing to invite your father for Christmas dinner so you could be with both of them. Good luck!

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  • deb m
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    i would stay with my mother i wouldn't want her to be alone.

    could do what my daughter did and now her daughter does half the day with each parent if possible. Its a busy day for the child but she gets to see both parents Good luck to you wish you well

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  • 1 decade ago

    I think it's horrible that your family makes you choose at all. What vindictive people.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    tell them both how you feel and to stop putting you in the middle of your situations

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