Does everyone compare new men in their lives to those who have gone before?

If so, does it get harder to find the 'right' man and have a lasting relationship because the new one can never measure up to the best bits of those who went before?

(only 3 men in my life, all very different; I want to melt them together and create the perfect man)

17 Answers

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    you will never stop comparing , thats life you can't delete memory .

    I was there and found that the best girl for me was the one I hurt the most and left a long time ago , and even got married to another guy .

    but you never know you got it till you loose it .

  • 1 decade ago

    Ok, this is BS. There is no "perfect" man ladies. If a guy doesn't cheat on, doesn't play games with your head, tries to be sweet, loves you, etc., then he's the closest you will come to perfect. Men make a lot of mistakes, not intentionally, but it happens. I'm personally sick of being misrepresented by Nora Roberts novels, and the like. There are decent men out there, men who go above and beyond, yet, they aren't always the ripped abs, huge muscles, blonde hair, blue type. Sometimes they are the pudgy, pale skin, poets, with hearts of gold. You will never find a good guy if you compare him to every other guy. Because eventually, not only will you no longer compare him to the good, but you'll also compare him to the bad.

    Neurotically Yours,


  • Dennis
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    From a guy's perspective (me), cause i'm reminded too much of the BAD things the women before her did to me, and why they with the new love i actually had hope :).

    I had quite a few bad relationship experiences..if you can call it that....and then i met my fiance who was the EPITOMY (if i spelled that right) of everything i wanted in a woman. I can suppose because she was much more a decent person than the ex in the past, but she was the imperfect world's perfect woman in my eyes...and that's why i'm marrying her dammit. Yea there were one or 2 things my exes had better than her...but that's just was ONE or 2 things....some which my baby can probably learn or qualities that were just 'luxury' anyway...cause after that it was the 'other' bad qualities that my baby thank god doesn't have and/or had BETTER. Can't have the whole cake with the piece you got....she entails everything i need and i can care less if the other women had better in a certain area.

  • 1 decade ago

    I dont agree that the old realtionships are always the best ones.. I am currently with my 3rd boyfriend. My 2nd boyfriend was better than the 1st and the 3rd one is the perfect one for me. We compare between the persons to choose the right one. I also believe that a with her love a woman can bring a lot of change in a mans life.

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  • 1 decade ago

    NO NO. NEVER. I do not see how or why you would do such a thing. The reason that the past men are such is because they were not right. A new man is a completely new person and I wish for him to be nothing like those before him.

    I can see, if you are to do as you say, then it will become difficult to find the right man. If you are the opposite, it becomes easier as each wrong man is gone and you begin to realize just what the Mr. right should have and be like.

  • 1 decade ago

    I'm a guy, and no I don't compare the women in my life. They are just so different, it's like comparing some of your best friends, which would be really difficult also. Treat each person you know as a whole individual, if you dissect all the time, you'll never be satisfied with anyone new.

  • 1 decade ago

    I think everyone does to some extent. But it is a good thing to do ...then you have an idea of what you are looking for. Keep in mind...there is no such thing as a perfect man. You need to find one with flaws you are willing to deal with. Good Luck.

  • 1 decade ago

    Keep trying to perfect it...but realize that there will never be the perfect man. The more you live...the more you'll learn...

    Also remember that once you're not comparing've either found the biggest stud..or the biggest loser ever...and still won't be perfect.

  • 1 decade ago

    never do that, no man is perfect. Just look at a man and see the reasons you like the man, don't compare him to anything you will never get the perfect man that way.

  • Its me
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    All you chicks keep picking scum, and ignoring the good guys.

    That is until you are a single mom and need some stability.

    The better guys are hip to it and staying single.

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