becky o asked in Social SciencePsychology · 1 decade ago

Help me please. I am a Chinese student .This is long article and some paragraphs I can not understand it.?

(according to the Psychologis's Book of Self-Tests, Louis H Janda) As in so many areas of life, experience makes it difficult to remain idealistic about romantic love. Studies have shown that college students tend to be more romantic than older, more experienced adults. That is why your parents may seen hopelessly conservative and cautious about love. They probably weren’t always that way. They simply have the wisdom that sometimes comes with age.I realize I myself may sound cynical about romantic love, and perhaps I am.While I do believe there isn’t felling that even comes close to being as exciting as being in love, I also have seen too many couples who based their decision to marry on their intense emotional attachment for each other only to learn later that they were completely incompatible in every other way.

I do not how to explain this paragrahs .Someone can helpe me, please?

Update:

excuse me .accordong to tihs paragraphs .I realize I myself may sound cynical about romantic love, and perhaps I am.While I do believe there isn’t felling that even comes close to being as exciting as being in love, I also have seen too many couples who based their decision to marry on their intense emotional attachment for each other only to learn later that they were completely incompatible in every other way. Being in love is a wonderful experience, but it is not sufficient justification for making a decision that will affect the rest of your life. When choosing a lifelong partner, we need to be as objective, rational, and clearheaded as possible .Unfortunately, being in love often makes it difficult to summon these

qualities. Several researcher have documented the summon observation that we overlook the defects or imperfections in our lovers. It is only after love has worn off that we can see their deficiencies.

How should I explain this paragraph ? Thank you.

Update 2:

Let us return, for a moment, to hunt's remark that we are firmly of two minds when it comes to romantic love. What he meant was that most of us are smart enough and rational enough not to let our hearts control our lives. We all want to fall in love, but we have the wisdom to fall in love with people who are similar to

ourselves in terms of background temperament, and values –factors that important to a stable relationship. Even if we seem romantic,part of us remains objective enough to make relatively good choices when it comes to selecting a partner.People who are very romantic allow their emotions to overcome their reason. For instance, young women who have an unwanted pregnancy have higher romanticism scores than those who do not. A more common problem among the extremely romantic is the tendency to make commitments too quickly, and then to become disappointed once the felling of romantic love inevitably begin to fade. This paragraphs is mean? I'm very scare to presentation this.

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  • 1 decade ago
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    Basically, it's saying that younger people such as college students are more romantic because they are only focused on emotional attachment such as love. Some older and "wiser" people as they say, begin to realize when they married, it was only because of love like the much younger college students. They also start to realize that they are different in almost every other way such as hobbies and interests.

    In my opinion, they are trying to say that to get married, love is not enough. You must connect on multiple levels like hobbies and interests to make it work effectively in the long term.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Love is not something that can be measured, however a person's ability to love can be determined..statistics state that inherent in humans is the need to repair fractured relationships that occurred with primary care givers and that we will attempt to do that over and over again in all of our personal relationships...with successful psychotherapy a person is made more aware of this tendency and therefore has a greater perception and a greater ability to act consciously vs subconsciously..premarital counseling can also bring to light the reasons behind such intense emotional attachments to partners. this is another way to flush out old family of origin patterns of behavior and to identify any unfinished emotional business one has leaving the space for there to be both feelings and thoughts to coexist within the relationship as feelings are a necessary part of life and the ability to know ones self and others

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  • 1 decade ago

    Real simply: Look before you leap.

    A point is made that emotions displace intelligence sometimes.

    Many many people are incapable of seeing beyond their emotions.

    Know yourself before you get into an inter-dependent relationship.

    See how much you want from someone is neurotic dependence.

    Knowing the above might only be found through psychoanalysis.

    Lots of luck to you.

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  • 1 decade ago

    This paragraph means that colledge students are more romantic than older people, also some relationships fail because it is based too early on love only and nothing else.

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