my boyfriend gets soft after 5 mins of intercourse.. HELP?!?!?!?

Alright... so my boyfriend and I have been have been having intercourse for like 4 months now. I was his first ever. The first time we did it, he didn't come. Isn't that unusual for a first time guy?! And lately when we do it, he is hard when he goes in, and then he gets soft inside of me and he cant get it back up. And I feel nothing really... no pleasure at all. What does that mean? Another thing that is bugging me is when I want to please him (orally) because i want to please him, he usually stops me and says that he is happy just being with me and he says he doesn't need for me to finish him. Honestly, what guy would not want that?! He is always giving and not receiving (even though i want to give). I was just asking if there are any really good tips you know that would arouse him, or make him have greater interest in doing it. Both of my issues that I am having are confusing and I have no idea what the problem is! Please help!!

7 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    It sounds like, sexually, he's just not that into you. Why shouldn't guys be just like girls in that regard?

    So while it could mean he's gay, it's not necessarily so. Maybe there are other girls he'd be into. Or maybe he's too nervous about sex for a lot of reasons: he feels he's too young, he's worried about the contraception you're using, he feels guilty about premarital sex because of his religion, etc.

    He may not even really know the reason himself. The only way to find out is to talk to him, and help him be honest with himself and with you.

    Meantime, do not take it as anything personal against you. You don't have to do or be anything special to please him; either there's chemistry there or there isn't. Find out what is on his mind, and then decide where your relationship goes from there.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    It sounds like your boyfriend may be pleasuring HIMSELF a little too much -- or he's getting it from somewhere other than you. Unless he's like 60 years old, he should be responding a little more positively while having intercourse. Time to have a little talk with him and decide between you what course of action (if any) needs to be taken. I wish you well!

    Merry Christmas!

  • 1 decade ago

    He sounds like he needs a little help. What man doesn't want a head job? Finishing is all the reward. Maybe because he is inexperienced, he's apprehensive about what to do. See if you can get him to relax and enjoy the ride. It really can be a pleasure trip!

  • you better have a long talk with this guy....i know what your talking about i had a guy like that and it was hard ( no joke ) to stay with him and it finally broke it off ( no joke ). girlfriend has needs and wants and if his little brain don't work mama's going to walk. ciao sweety

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  • 1 decade ago

    Maybe he has E.D umm maybe go see a doctor to see if he has it he might need viagra

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    He's Gay!

    Better find another guy to uhhh, fill your gap!

    Merry XMAS!!

  • 1 decade ago

    he sounds insecure with his penis. mayebe he should get it checked out, if he loves you but isn't delivering, there mght be something clinically wrong

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