Why do I do this to myself every month ??

I tell myself every month that I will get pregnant when God is ready for me to be. I try not to get my hopes up and obsess over every little "symptom" or day that my period is late because when I think I might be pregnant and then I'm not it feels like I lost something. But lo and behold here I am again, obsessing because I have a tiny bit of spotting and my period is not due till Friday or Saturday. I want it to be implantation spotting SOOOO bad that I am totally... well, obsessing. How do I stop this madness? Everyone keeps saying "just relax." Ok, gladly......tell me how! Please if anyone has been through this and has any helpful advice it would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

12 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    i go through that too.

    if you've been trying for awhile you might want to look into fertility pills or treatments (especially if you wouldn't mind having twins) :)

    at any rate, what i do that has helped me is a i distract myself with house work and positive self talk- if you really believe that God will help you get pregnant when the time is right, then you gotta really act like you believe it. pray more, read your scriptures, find insights from things that give you spiritual strength to really believe that pregnant or not its the way it's supposed to be. accepting the Lord's will is often the hardest part... easier said than done. espeically in a situation like this, where you know you want to have a baby and you know that it's a good thing, too. just keep the faith, you'll be ok! :)

    sorry to get preachy i try to keep as little religion in my answers as possible, don't want to offend. :)

  • 1 decade ago

    I know what you are going through. It took me 7 yrs to get pregnant. There is nothing you can do about the obsessing. Try to keep busy is really the best answer I can give. When you hear about other people getting pregnant - it's okay to go off by yourself and have a good cry. Just try not to let it get you to depressed. I was all set to start injections but the specialist said I needed my yearly first. Of course it took a month and a half to get into my regualar OB. The week before the Dr's appt. my period was late. I wasn't going to get a test because of all the previous one's that came back negative but my husband said go ahead get one - I took the test and lo and behold I was pregnant naturally. Just don't give up. I went through a lot of testing which is stressfull all on it's own. If for some reason it doesn't work out that you get pregnant you'll have to find a way on your own to deal with it. Everyone is different, everyone has their own coping mechanisms you will be fine.

  • Gig
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    I was there, 8 cycles it took me ot get pregnant. All things concidered this wasn't very long but 8 months of waiting was enough to make me crazy. You really do need to relax about it, as frustrating as that sounds. I don't know how mind you because i thought i was getitng rather obsessive by the end myself. The only cure is pregnancy i'm affraid.

    What I ended up using was the "Instead Cup" and that's how i finally got pregnant. You have sex normally, then just put it in afterwards, have another orgasm then wait. Keep the cup in place so all the spermies don't leak out. They cost about $6 at your drug store and are with the tampons etc. It worked for me anyway.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    OMG i am on the same page. My husband and i have only been trying for a short time but i was just sure we would be able to tell our parents the good news for christmas. Yea.....took a test and then started my period about an hour after. I have bought books and read everything in the world and all i want is a baby. The only way i have managed to relax is to work on my body. I eat right...i mean almost perfect. I exercise and just try to take care of myself. That new goal has given me a purpose and my thoughts have been transferred over to my workouts and eating habits. That is the only way i have been able to keep my mind off of it. Until Sunday at church when i held a 1 month old baby and burst into tears......just hang in there hun. It will happen, i am praying for you. Keep me posted.

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  • 1 decade ago

    LOL....I'm not laughing at you, but how much you remind me of myself. I do the same thing every month. I feel the same way every month, The saddest day of the month is when I get my period. Last month it was 5 days late and I thought I was feeling "symptoms" like you said. I don't know what to do either, I try to relax and be greatful for what I do have, but I want it so bad and it creeps into my thoughts and the closer I get to my period date the more anxious I become...It is a horrible cycle....I wish you the best of luck. I'm not going to tell you to relax because I know it is impossible, I'm just going to tell you, you are not alone. I know exactly what you are feeling.

    Good Luck and God Bless

  • 1 decade ago

    You are not alone. It took 9 months to conceive my daughter. During the 8th month ttc, my OB did a laparoscopy to check my organs and found I had a mild case of endometriosis, which he removed immediately. I conceived the very next month, so I assumed it was the endo that had prevented me from conceiving. After my daughter was born I went on bcp to keep the endo in remission. I thought as soon as I went off the pill, I would get pregnant. Well, I'm in my 7th month ttc. Last month I actually broke down in my OB's office out of heartache and frustration. Something which is very out of character for me.

    It's hard to "relax" when you are so anxious and hopeful and getting signals from your body which you are sure that they are early signs of pregnancy. The worst is when you are a day late and you really get hopeful, only to get AF later in the day or the next morning. My mom and sisters are constantly asking about the status of my period, which makes it even harder to forget about.

    The only thing that has helped me is to think of the positive things in my life. I have been blessed with a beautiful, healthy baby girl, and if she is my only child, I am so very greatful to be her mommy. But I also have a wonderful husband to share my frustration and heartaches with. My family and friends have beens supportive as well.

    I would just like to ask, have you been to your OBGYN or are you just ttc on your own? I strongly recommend making an appointment with your OB. Let him/her know you are ttc. There are some tests that can be done to rule out certain medical issues, like hormone imbalances. You don't have to wait a year to seek professional help. Had I not gone to my OB right away, I might have never conceived.

    Once again, you are not alone. Sometimes just knowing that can help you cope with your own feelings. Best luck to you.

  • 1 decade ago

    oh girl i have been there, my husband and i were trying and i thought i was pregnant and so excited but i went to the doc to make sure bc ya know sometimes preg. tests don't tell you right away and i went and it came back neg so i know how you feel when you say you feel like you lost something, even tho you never really had it in the first place. all i can tell you to do is just pray about and go into it with a good open heart and God will let you know when its your time. bc apparently it wasn't my time either. like i said just keep praying and know that you are in my prayers too! Merry Christmas!

  • 1 decade ago

    No no no you don't "just relax", you have to be relaxed when you're having sex, not while you're waiting to see if you're pregnant or not. Sounds to me like you just want a baby really bad and there's nothing wrong with being excited =). Hope you're pregnant this month! Good luck

  • SNAP!
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    i know what you mean....even if you convince yourself that you're not obsessing, once your period comes you realize how much you had invested in it NOT coming.......i think it's rude to tell some-one going thru a difficult experience to "just relax"....that accomplishes nothing.....if you were able to "just relax" you'd be doing it already!!

    ....all i can think to tell you is to maybe find some things to do to fill your time and keep pregnancy and babies off your mind a bit....go to the bookstore and pick up some books you can "escape" into....start a new hobby, etc.....

    good luck!

  • lola
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    I'm doing the same thing right now! You can take "first response" pregnancy test 5 days before your missed period!

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