Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 1 decade ago

why does my bf cheat even though he knows that i will find out and hes been caught before?

he has cheated on me like 4 or 5 times before and i have caught him and i always find out...why does he do it but then when he gets caught he wants another chance and he tells me that he still loves me.i always give him another chance because i love him...but why does he do it???

28 Answers

Relevance
  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    because you let him. move on. respect yourself, he doesn't.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    The pattern continues b/c you accept it, that's why. He is not respectful toward you and/or the relatioship with you....and he's always able to convince you that you're his true love. He probably even makes sure you find out. If a guy wants to conceal an affair it's not that hard. He probably gets a kick out of the drama that's generated from his cheating, your expressions of pain, and the make up sex. You need to evaluate your own self esteem, and this situation is not helping. Independence is the key--learn to love yourself. If you can wake up....you stand a good chance of finding someone else that will value you and the relationship with you. It's your choice. The victim role does not put you in your best light.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    well girl i will tell you the truth about this .he cheats it is because you let him.see once a man cheats and has been caught then if he does it again it is because he knows your weak and he can keep doing it .girl if he has cheated 4 or 5 times then he is not your man but rather yours and everybody elses to.look if you decide to give him another chance then be firm and say it is the last chance he will get cause you already have someone waiting on you to be single.look don,t let him keep playing you cause ther is someone waiting to meet you and treat you better but you won,t find him if you contine to stay with a man who is wrong for you.if you stay then you will eventually start to feel that every man is going to do you wrong just because he has.i am speaking from experience ok good luck girl

  • 1 decade ago

    Becuase you keep letting him get away with it. For example, a kid that takes a cookie from the kitchen, and the mom doesnt punish him, will always go and keep taking the cookie. However if the mom punish the kid, the kid will mostly likely not try to steal it. Or this guy could just like getting caught, it excite him that you catch him. You need to put your foot down and tell him that next time he does this, it over and ur serious. You need to back up your words, if you dont then you are going to be walked all over. I dont know if you need to yell or scream or whatever, but get ur point across that if he cheats again, he DONE...and if he does do it, BREAK UP WITH HIM FOR GOOD.

  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • 1 decade ago

    He does it because you let him. The fact that you still consider this jerk your boyfriend tells me a lot. Telling someone you love them and then sleeping around on them isn't love. Its selfishness. And the fact that he's done this multiple times and you STILL take him back... do you live together? Is the situation such that to break up would uproot one or both of you? All I can say is if you want to continually get cheated on until he brings home a special gift (aka an STD), then by all means, stick with the loser. But if you want a REAL man who REALLY loves you, dump the jackass and move on!

  • 1 decade ago

    Because you allow him to by staying with him and giving him chances. You have not left him. Why are you still letting yourself get treated like this? Do me a favor and dump his pathetic a*s and get a real guy that will love and Cherish only you. There are plenty of men out there honey, you just have to make yourself available to them. Go to coffee shops, restaurant/lounges not bars. and places like those to find a really interesting guy. He is putting you through hell inside and he is being abusive to you mentally. Let him go, grieve a little if need be and hit the nice guy joints. I know there will be pain for you but sounds like he is giving you pain already and if he loved you then there would be only love. Good Luck and wish the best for you.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    You're asking the wrong question. The question should be "Why are you still with him??" He obviously doesn't think too highly of you if he's been caught cheating on several occasions. He continues to cheat because you've pretty much told him that you'll stay with him regardless. Cut this guy loose. He's a loser and you deserve better.

  • 1 decade ago

    Stop giving him more chances, there is a saying that goes like that: Once a cheater, always a cheater. The best thing to do would be to dump him immediately. You say that you love him but obviously you don't trust him, and without trust there can be no love. So l know it will be hard, but let him go, it's the best thing to do.

    Good luck to you

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Because you allow him to. You are making it ok for him to cheat by taking him back time and again. Sure he says he loves you. Talk is cheap. He goes out of his way to hurt you and you let him do it! I am sure that you love him but he does not love you. Is this what you want? Leave him, give yourself time to grieve and heal and then think about dating again. You are worth so much more than this sham of a relationship.

    Good luck.

  • 1 decade ago

    He does it because there are really no consequences and honey, if he really loved you like you deserve..he wouldn't do it because he would understand the hurt that it causes you. One cheating episode is a mistake, after that its a habit, a way of life. That's how he is ..accept that you will be sharing him with others or say good bye. Remember he is exposing you to all kinds of STD. Good luck.

  • 1 decade ago

    The answer is direct. You are the one that creates it cos you keep giving him the chance. To teach him a lesson, stay away from him for months and if he comes back, then he should be a changed person. But if he opts to leave you, then I would say that it is a blessing fpr you cos you don't have to live on agony throughout your life.

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.