How can I say, "pay seperately" properly in a birthday invitation?

We're throwing a surprise birthday party for our Mom's 60th. It's mostly family but we're inviting a few of her good friends. Since it's mostly family we're all going to pay our own bill at the restaurant(a really nice one). How do we politely tell her friends this in the invitation? "You are invited, but you have to pay foot own bill" That doesn't sound right. Can someone please give me the proper way to put this in the invitation?

18 Answers

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  • SNAP!
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    typically when some-one hosts a party they are responsible for the cost....the only thing i can think to do is not call it a "party", since it really isn't.,...it's more just everyone meeting for dinner......i would say something like "meet us for dinner at soandso restraunt....cake will be provided...."

  • 4 years ago

    Birthday Dinner Invitation

  • Anonymous
    5 years ago

    Put the name of the kid in the invite. As in - 'We would like Shawn to join us for a party at the movies!' Say nothing more. When you get to the theater, do a head count of the kids. Take charge by going to the box office and saying I'd like tickets for 8 kids and then buying your own ticket. Don't buy anymore. Don't apologize for not buying more tickets either, because that would imply you did something wrong by not buying their tickets in the first place. The parents are wrong for assuming that you should pay their way. You can also get an RSVP count of kids ahead of time and purchase the tickets ahead of time. Many movie theaters will let you buy tickets a week in advance. Good Luck! p.s. - I think Sharon has a great answer. I read it after I wrote mine.

  • 1 decade ago

    If I were invited to a birthday party at a restraunt, I would expect to pay my own way. Maybe say that it's a "BYOD&B event: Buy your own dinner and beverage" event. Mention that cake is provided, and make sure the guests have the name of the restraunt, as well as a price range for meals.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Be a bit careful, you could upset your mum. I would not be happy if my friends were invited to "my" party even a surprise one - and were expected to pay. Maybe have a think about how many friends you invite, and split their bill between you.

  • GrnApl
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    They have to pay for their own bill and bring her a gift?

    Don't send invitations. You're not really inviting them. Just inform the friends that the family will be meeting at a restaraunt to have dinner and that everyone is responsible for their own tab. If they would like to join or stop by to wish her well they are welcome and give the pertinent info.

  • 1 decade ago

    At most parties where a bar is set up they use host or no host bar provided. This way people know they have to pay for their own booze. Why not invite them and say it is a no host dinner party for your mother.

  • 1 decade ago

    I would say.....

    There will be a gathering to celebrate my Mother's birthday and we would be honored if you could attend. It will be held at such and such restaurant and it will be "dutch".

    It's important that you name the restaurant.....because if it is really a nice one....it might not be in some people's budget since they'll be picking up their own tab..

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    There's no polite way. If you can't afford to pay for your guests don't invite them. I can't think of anything worse than paying for my dinner and having to give the birthday girl a gift.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    There is no proper way, because it is not considered "proper" to invite a guest to a party and expect them to pay for their own meal.

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