Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 decade ago

would you stay with your spouse because you have kids together?

13 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Sure, if you & your spouse want to continue ruining more lives.

    Children are known to become like & marry their parents.

    I.E. Boys become like their father and marry women like their mom. Girls become like their mother and marry men like their dad.

    Imagine the examples being set for the kids, they are smart enough to pick up on a relationship that doesn't work.

    Source(s): Hey, it's my opinion and personal observation. Why are some on this board taking things personally? Seriously, "girl beneath me" get some therapy why dont cha?
  • 1 decade ago

    yes, I would and I have. I recently told mine to leave if he couldn't at least act normal. You'd have to know him to understand. I'd still let him come back. I have a theory and it might sound dumb but I think it's better for my kids to see what he is while their growing up rather than making him leave and them wanting to be around him when their older because they don't know him. The circumstances depend on staying together. Our circumstances would give me all the right and legal standing to terminate his parental rights. He's not horrible, one of his main things is that he lacks remorse most of the time and he thinks he can do whatever and not get in trouble for it. It sounds worse than it is, but his little outbursts could put him in prison. The reason I told him to leave is because my daughter was acting up to much, his thoughts of no consequences were becoming hers. She's only 3, but she knows pretty much how it is. I lived this theory. My mom was around long enough for me to know how she is, and I don't bother communicating with her. The other two kids she had were with her long enough to have the same feelings. She left when I was 8, social services took her other two kids at 10 & 8. At that time I believe the kids really know how the parent is and they can see who cares and who doesn't care. That would make a child not want to live like that in their life. In my case, I chose someone almost like my mom, not because I was seeking someone like her, because I didn't know any better. My husband wasn't how he is now when I met him. My dad couldn't do much because he worked 2nd shift and no babysitter wanted to stay. I have, I guess what I would call a flaw, I still have the idea that someone can be helped and be shown why they should change. In my husband's case he did stop one thing that I never thought he would because of the contempt I have for what it was. It's a slow process. I've heard that as long as it takes to do something is as long as it takes to undo. So, if that's true, in my husband's case; I met him when he was 20 about to be 21. He was literally raised to be the way he is, his father and grandmother taught him to act like this to collect money from SSI for him and his father frauded them after he left; so I've been with him nearly 7 years, which that means I have about 13 years left to see if that's true to undo something like that. I'm sorry I probably typed way too much.

    To the guy who is above me, I'm nothing like my mother, not even in the smallest detail other than hair and eye color, and blood type.

  • 1 decade ago

    not if things were not going good. because the kids will see that you and him fight all the time and that is not good. so i would just leave. i think it is not right to stay in a marriage that is bad just for the sake of the kids.

  • 1 decade ago

    No... Being in a household with parents who do not love and respect each other is damaging to a child and teaches them that is what to expect in thier own marriage...

    It is far better to split up so the child has a chance to grow up in a loving single parent home rather than a hostile dual parent home..

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  • 1 decade ago

    i the female strongly suggest absoulty not because its not going to hurt you but deeplyhurt the kids in the long run and if u dont really love your spouse then move on so that way neither one of you are hurt in the long run

  • 1 decade ago

    Not again. I stayed in a really bad relationship cuz of my daughter and I was miserable and she learned to treat me the same way her father did. Now we have a very strained relationship(she's 12 now). Get out while you can it will be better for everyone.

  • 1 decade ago

    I would have stayed with my ex and tried to work things out if I could have. Of course, that was not what she wanted so "Hit the road Jack!"

  • 1 decade ago

    I have, and glad that I made that decision, and happy, healed, and satified of working things out, mostly for the kids sake, but for my too!!

  • 1 decade ago

    having kids should mean not being selfish anymore,and unless their is physical abuse,just because one of you is "unhappy" with the shouldnt have to grow up missing one of the parents in the home.....when so many kids dont even know who one of their parents yes......if only for your kids......

  • 1 decade ago

    I am right now for the sake of my son

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