Wife makes me use condoms?

My wife and I have been married for 1 and half years, dating for almost 8. I have been faithful to her and she has been faithful to me throughout our whole relationship. Our sex life has diminished over the years and we may have sex a couple times a month. I would like to have sex more than that (it has been discussed and is a work in process).

One of the problems I cannot get over is that she insists that I wear a condom every time we have sex. It is a birth control issue for her. Neither of us want children at this time but she is on the pill. She take it pretty regularly (she may take it late couple times a month). She is paranoid about getting pregnant so she makes me use a condom on top of the pill.

Truthfully, every once in a while I would not have a problem doing it but every time is too much for me. Any one have any advice on how to talk her into letting me go bareback?

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  • Issym
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Why not ask her to use the vaginal film, aka female condom. See if she likes it. There is also different types of extra proofing she can do then make you use a condom. Spermicide in a tube, Encare (its bullet like insert that melts that's a spermicide), instead of the pill have her check into a IUD. Tell her the condom diminishes the feel you get during sex. Your married for Pete's sakes you should be at least able to have bareback sex with proper cautions since its only pregnancy your worrying about instead of std's.. good luck to you. I would also suggest letting her come here and read these responses.

    Have her check out the sites below.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Condoms are a drag BUT thats the least of your problems. You should be very happy your using condoms. She's taking birth control pills every once and a while not every day. That's a quick way to get pregnant without additional protection.

    She's not giving you enough sex and there's frustration in your message. That's the other thing you need to be considering. It's good to see you both are working on that as well.

  • 1 decade ago

    That is a hard one... I think that perhaps you should just keep doing it with the condom on for now...at least until you guys either have a more romantic love life. I think that at this point if you suggest that she might just tell you that you aren't going to have any for a while. Once your love life gets a little better and your doing it a little more often, that might be a good time to mention it. It sounds like she's already too sensitive about the whole idea right now... bringing something new into the subject would just make it more complicated. One step at a time.

  • 1 decade ago

    She sounds really smart and responsible. If you can't deal with it, maybe you are with the wrong person.

    The pill is not full-proof. What would you do if she got pregnant. I've been in that situation and wished I had worn a f***ing condom instead of knocking up a girl I liked, but didn't want to spend the rest of my life with. I guess, maybe she just thinks that the needs for using a condom everytime are more important than you wants. Again, if this doesn't work for you, maybe you should find someone more your style.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    First of all IF you are an adult male (and I highly doubt that you are) You would know that the birth control pill is NOT 100% effective and that IF you didn't want to have children you would not have any problems compling with using a condom during sex.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Well my advice to you is that I think your wife does not want to have children right know. You should be glad that she is willing to protect her self and you. yeah but like you said, all the time is a problem if she is taking the pill. maybe y'all should make an agreement maybe once out the week where y'all don't wear condoms but make sure you don't ejaculate in her.

  • 1 decade ago

    If you really cared about your wife this should be a non issue, the pill is not 100 % affective. If you get pregnant, she will be the one who has to carry it to term. You should be happy you have someone to use a condom with.

  • 1 decade ago

    Be thankful, I personally think she's having sex with other men and is making sure she doesn't transmit any acquired STD's to you by making you use protection, under the guise of 'fear of pregnancy'. You'd better assess your relationship carefully, you've only been with her in matrimony for 1 1/2 years and already the sex has petered out? Hmmm...maybe just for you!

  • 1 decade ago

    Well if she missed her pill a couple of times a month, and you ride bareback a couple times a month, that could quickly add up to.......BABY!

    More oral would be an answer. The patch for her, less opportunity to forget. More spice.

  • 1 decade ago

    well YOU CAN STILL GET PREGNANT ON THE PILL MY SISTER DID. SO IF YOU BOTH DO NOT WANT CHILDREN THEN SHE IS MAKING YOU DO THE RIGHT THING. SO JUST DEAL WITH IT. YEAH I DO THE SAME THING I BEEN MARRIED FOR ABOUT FIVE YEAS BEEN WITH HIM FOR 12 years TOTAL AND WE DO NOT HAVE SEX AS OFTEN AS WE SHOULD EITHER. WHAT DO YOU DO TO MAKE IT GOOD? you have to make it romatic and not just slam bam thank you mam. Tell her you love her and give her messages and maybe put roses on the bed put candles out just do romatic things first have foreplay FIRST. PAY ATTENTION TO HER THROUGH OUT THE DAY AND DO NOT BEG HER FOR SEX EITHER AND RESPECT THAT SHE IS RESPECTING YOUR WISHES AND USING THE PILL SHE IS DOING HER PART SO YOU GUYS DO NOT HAVE KIDS AND YOU NEED TO DO YOURSE ALSO.

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