Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Pregnancy & ParentingOther - Pregnancy & Parenting · 1 decade ago

How do you know when you are ready to have a baby?

I am 20 and my husband is 23. We've been married for 1 and he wants a baby. I have a irregular cycles and possible PCOS. I love my husband and he is everything I dreamed of, so it hurts me to look at his face as the months go by. BUT..... in my heart I really do not desire a baby.... RIGHT NOW

WHAT SHOULD I DO?

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    wait. you'll know, sometimes we dont know when we are ready, and pregnancy happens, it is until we see that little face, that is so dependant we acknowledge our commitment to them, and to god to take care of them.

    If he loves you, he will wait till you acomplish the things you need to do before your ready to be a mother.

    take this from the woman with the best husband and father., I get much help, but majority of the work, school, illness, day in and day outs falls on me , if your not ready to put aside your life, then please wait., I am not saying a mother does not deserve her own time, but we all know we cant up and leave, we cant just register for class, go out just because because there would be a child involved.

    Maybe set a goal for a family with your husband. a time line,. this way when you cross that path you have given yourself time to adjust to the idea,

  • 1 decade ago

    Of course he wants a baby. He isn't going to be the primary caregiver, right? You need to get over that guilt trip you're on right now. Having a child is LIFE-CHANGING!! And it's not always for the better. Don't get me wrong having children adds a depth to your life that you won't have otherwise but they are a life-time commitment, 24-7, 365 days a year. You are very young to be making that commitment. Live your life a little longer and don't feel guilty about it - you'll have enough guilt when you do become a mother.

  • 1 decade ago

    The kicking in the stomach, the missed periods and so on will show that you are pregnant. On the other hand, if you are having nausea, states that you have the guy's kid! You need to be frank with hubby and see whether you can reach an agreement. If both are ready for parenthood, go ahead and give it a try! if not, just focus on the relationship and wait till your/his next birthday and then you both can decide to have children!

    Source(s): School textbook!
  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Explain to him why you don't want a baby. Tell him that you're both still young and you want to have time to spend with him before you have the responsibility of one. If you want a baby in the future, tell him that. Enjoy your life together as it will for sure be different once you bring a new life to the world!

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  • 1 decade ago

    It is your body who will be carrying the baby, and you will be the one who will responsible for caring for the baby when it arrives. I would sit him down and explain that having a baby is a lot of responsiblity and that you want to make certain that you will able to be the best mother to the best of your ability, because you love him so much, and that you are not ready to be a mother at this time.

  • 1 decade ago

    both of you need to discuss this seriously. a baby IS GOING to change your life. if you are going to school, starting a career, whatever it may be, the baby will change that entirely. please be very sure when you make a decision like that.. and let him know you're serious when you say that you are not ready. he must have to understand, especially if you give good enough reasons why you both feel you should wait. communication is key! good luck

  • 1 decade ago

    Here's some things you can talk over with your husband. (time, ambitions, cost, etc) You can help him to see from your point of view, in a loving way, that waiting is best for right now. Good luck to you!

  • 1 decade ago

    If you do not want a baby right now and you think that you are not ready then try to expalin that to him..he should try to understand if he really loves you... I did not have my first until almost 26 and now I am having my second at almost 29...

  • 1 decade ago

    Don't have a baby. Simple. It's not his choice. It's not his decision. You're the one who will pay the price of childbirth and parenting. If you're asking others how do you know when it's time, then you're not ready. Good luck.

  • 1 decade ago

    Well be thankful that you have not become pregnant then if it is not your wish.

    You need to let your husband know what is in your heart, that's what love is - letting the other know how you feel.

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