What is a nice way to ask people to..?

It is flu/cold season and I don't want my daughter to catch anything. She is only 4 days old. When people want to touch I just ask "Please wash your hands first." and they get all offended. My aunt even screamed at me. What is the nice way to ask? Should I just not let them touch her? Yes,I do wash my hands before touching her.


Well 5 days old now.

Update 2:

I have been refusing to let people touch her if they didn't wash/sanitize their hands first. They get all defensive.

28 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    i still think you should just ask people to wash their hands.. i dont think you'd wanna sick 5 year old baby. =[

    just tell them that you dont want your baby to get sick.

  • 1 decade ago

    What you are doing is perfectly acceptable and it's the right thing to do. Ask any Dr. and they will tell you that you are right. If someone refuses to wash their hands or sanitize with purell then they don't need to touch your daughter. You are NOT being rude in any way by asking people to wash their hands first. If someone would have yelled at me when I asked them to wash their hands first I would have told them to leave my house. Good for you for having people wash their hands before touching your daughter...people used to tell me I was paranoid because I was the same way...but it really is the best thing for the baby.

  • 1 decade ago

    Sorry, most of the people around my baby at that age knew enough to wash their hands first. I don't think it's wrong of you to ask them, and if they throw a fit, tough. It's not hard to go wash their hands, without making a big deal out of it. Get used to speaking up about things now, you'll most likely have to do it more in the future. And after all, just remember that it's YOUR child, and you have every right to your own opinions and ways. Not everyone is going to agree with you, but it doesn't matter anyway.

  • 1 decade ago

    I understand you want to keep her safe and healthy...

    But please keep in mind that germs are passed many other ways other than just washing hands. If they are holding her or even just touching her they are exposing her to all kinds of things. I do not say that to scare you I say that to make you aware it is much more than just washing hands. She will catch things. And that is ok. It is ok for babies to get sick and even helpful for them. It helps build up their immune system young (maybe not as young as she is but it needs to be done before 3-5) and plus she is so young the antibodies from you are still protecting her.

    Remember if they are around her they are breathing on her, spreading germs from their clothing, etc etc etc, Not to mention airborn things.

    It is great to want to keep your baby safe. And hopefully your loved ones practice good hygene. And wash their hands when needed. However washing hands alone is not going to protect her. And honestly like I said before you wouldnt want to keep her from everything.

    Also from having children I know that you are probably touching her a lot. If you wash your hands before you touch her every single time that is probably at bare minimum 20 times a day. That is not good for you either. You are washing away good bacteria that you need on your skin to help protect you. Also you stand a very high risk of drying out your skin (especially this time of year) and even leading up to dry cracked open skin which would then leave you in danger and expose her to those germs in your open wounds.

    Be careful yes-but do not get carried away!!!

    On the other hand I think it was very rude of your aunt to yell at you and that was very disrespectful. In the end it is your child and up to you to decide what is best for her.

    Good luck and enjoy your new little angel!

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  • 1 decade ago

    I like the sign on the door idea! Just put a friendly but blunt note by the door

    "this is allergy and flu season- if you are sick, please come back when you feel well. We would love to see you.

    And just so you know, we always wash our hands before we hold the baby, and so will you :-) THANKS!"

    That way, your guests will know before entering what is expected, and even if they think you are nuts, you won't have to bear the brunt of their first response. If they reach for the baby, you can sweetly ask, "did you see our note on the door?" and go from there.

    Congratulations on your blessing and remember YOU are her parents and have every right to make the best decisions for her health and safety!

    ~Mom of 5 with one more on the way :-)

  • 1 decade ago

    That is absolutely the right thing for you to ask them to do. I would demand it. My brother and his wife just had a baby on the 16th and it is a rule in their house that all hands must be washed frequently. I even wore a mask last time I was there because I had a slight head cold. If it would be easier you could get a big pump bottle of the hand sanatizer. That is simpler than washing and kills 99% of germs. But stick to your guns, this is a serious matter. Your daughter is trying to develop her imune system and doesn't need any extra battles right now. Best of luck and congrats on you little bundle of joy!

  • 1 decade ago

    Don't be so scared. Doctor's recommend that you not take your baby out for the first two months other than to the doctor. My friend had a baby about two years ago and it was her first. She was very protective and still is. Just do what is right for you baby. Tell the person or people that you can hold my baby as long as you was your hands first please. If they get offended, then that is their problem not yours. Ask them to leave if they are going to undermind your decision to raise your child the way that you feel that you should raise him or her.

  • 1 decade ago

    my daughter is a high risk baby. I won't let any one in my house if they even have a sniffle. I keep hand sanitizer sitting everywhere. I even have notes on my door. This is RSV season, and even though your little one is not a preemie she can still get it. I would stand strong about the handwashing. If people get mad that is their loss. You child could end up in the hospital if they carry something in to her.

    Source(s): mommy of three, one preemie
  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Shame on your aunt, geesh!

    I totally understand your dilemma. My daughter is 3 mo. old and I'm still worried about it. What I do is: when I hand her off to someone, I hand them a bottle of sanitizer first and say, "Would you mind? It's flu season."

    If they refuse (and they're wierd if they do), then they don't get to hold her. You're the boss, momma! You do what's right for your little one.

    CONGRATS by the way!! I bet she's adorable!

  • 1 decade ago

    Just say that the doctor said! Most doctors don't recommend for a new baby to have visitors for 2-3 weeks this time of year due to colds and flu going around.

    This is your baby and if she gets sick, YOU have to take care of her, not them. Stand your ground and know you are doing the right thing. Sometimes being nice isn't effective, but "blaming" it on the doctor helps.

    Source(s): RN
  • 1 decade ago

    i kept that hand sanitizer right in my pocket at all times. everytime some one asked to touch the baby i would hand it to them and not say anything. they just used it. no one go offended. when they handed the sanitizer back to me i would use some and then hand them they baby. good luck . and you are doing the right thing they should have to wash there hands before they hold the baby. congrats.

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