Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Social SciencePsychology · 1 decade ago

Do u like my poem?

I Remember

I remember

When I though sleeping was a waste of my time

Now sleeping is the only way I can escape

I remember

All the days I spent having to much fun

Now fun is a waste of my time

I remember

When hapiness surrounded me

Now hapiness is defeated by sorrow

I remember

When sorrow never crossed my mind

Now sorrow crosses out happiness

I remember

When life burned through me

Like a bonfire

Now life is but a fragile flame

What do you think?

12 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    I hope that it is not directly related to the way you feel about your self image at this time, especially with the holidays approaching.

    Take care of yourself, but yes it is good there is a perfect time for that poem and it can be directly related to everyones life at some point.

    DEEP ehhh?

  • 1 decade ago

    it good i like the idea but use *too* instead of (all the days i spent having *to* much fun)

    and ill try to add stronger vocab to make a person actually feel ur pain u know what i mean?

    so it will be more then words on a paper but make it so itll send shivers down ur spine and let other ppl know the theme ur putting

    dont be mad at me for saying what i truly think but if u dont know ur mistakes u wont learn but keep practicing and ull turn out a great writer =)

  • 1 decade ago

    I did enjoy this poem. It is very deep. The words meld together in a complete way. It just flows well. All I hope is that you don't feel like that in real life. One song comes to mind, "Take Me" by Hawk Nelson. I think you should listen to it!!!!

  • 1 decade ago

    Good peom but you sound down .. no matter how bad life seems ther is some joy out there..it is hard to find but it is out there.. sounds silly but maybe a support group willl help.....

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  • 1 decade ago

    Its' a little depressing. Life is not all that bad. Need to add a few happy thoughts. It is still good though.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I think you should label it prose , not poetry , and mail it to someone that cares. Please pick someone you know and not someone off the net. There are many good programs that you can become involved with. Become a doer not a what if dreamer.

  • 1 decade ago

    I think is sounds great.

  • 1 decade ago

    I really like tihs... sounds like me...

  • your poem is all right

    Source(s): its all right
  • 1 decade ago

    it's great !!

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