How do i get out of my depression (in grad school)?

I am in grad school in math (2nd yr). I have been suffering from acute depression. I keep thinking about how low and worthless I am. Most of my batchmates who took real jobs seem to have both money and power, i have neither; i make $16500 a yr, less than a janitor. I am forced to bow to cocky undergraduates day... show more I am in grad school in math (2nd yr). I have been suffering from acute depression. I keep thinking about how low and worthless I am. Most of my batchmates who took real jobs seem to have both money and power, i have neither; i make $16500 a yr, less than a janitor. I am forced to bow to cocky undergraduates day after day. I hate teaching assistantships, they are more like having to lick up the stuff that is undigested in prof's lectures and feed it again. recently the dept moved me into an office no larger than a writing desk and now they are talking about whether grad students should have offices at all. I wonder what my fault is that I have become such a total failure. At times the pain gets so acute that I feel that if slitting my throat with a butcher knife is the only way out... so be it. leaving is not an option because that way I would have to give up everything i ever lived for. no money to consult a doctor.
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