Who's got the funniest "mommy, mommy" joke for me?

doctor, doctor jokes are also fine.

5 Answers

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Mommy, Mommy, I hate my brother's guts.

    Shut up and eat what's in front of you

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  • 1 decade ago

    It's not a joke, but I figured I'd share, anyway. It should make you smile if not laugh.

    5 years ago my mother, little sister, little brother and I were moving. My mom had just packed all of her belongings from her drawers into a box. My little bro went to go pick up the box and put it in the car when he stopped, put the box down, pulled out my mom's dildo and asked her what it was - infront of us, the movers and our neighbors!

    It was hilarious...and he even said "mommy."

    We still pick on him about it to this day.

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  • Jim and Edna were both patients in a psychiatric hospital. One day while

    they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into

    the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there.

    Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim

    out. When the Head Nurse Director became aware of Edna's heroic act, she

    immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now

    considered her to be mentally stable.

    When she went to tell Edna, she said, "Edna, I have good news and bad

    news. The good news is you're being discharged...since you were able to

    rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of another

    patient, I have concluded that your act displays sound mindedness. The bad

    news is that Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself in the bathroom with

    his bathrobe belt right after you saved him. I am so sorry, but he's dead."

    Edna replied, "He didn't hang himself, I put him there to dry. How soon can I go home?"

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  • 1 decade ago

    Day At The Circus

    Mother, father and young son are visiting the circus. The elephants walk out into the circus ring and the little boy says to his mother, "What's that?"

    "That's the elephant's tail," she replies.

    "No, under the tail," says the youngster.

    The mother is clearly embarrassed and says, "Oh, nothing."

    The boy turns to his father and repeats the same question.

    His father looks and says, "That's the elephant's penis, son."

    "So, why did mum say it was nothing?" asks the boy.

    The father draws himself up to his full height and says, "Son, I've spoiled that woman."

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Mother! Mother! I'm tired of running in circles!

    Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the floor!

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