Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 decade ago

What can I do to stop my husband from becoming jealous of other guys when we go out somewhere?

My Husband gets all offened if I wear anything sexy when we go out somewhere. He thinks, that guys are going to be drooling all over me. Or that somebody will try to do something to me. He knows I get all dressed up for him... but he still acts kind of strange.

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    If you are wearing really sexy things when you go out..it is quite evident men will stare and give admiring looks at you. It is human nature to do so. If it is a real problem and you say you do it for him, then why not stop doing it. He seems to have problems with it. Would seem the best thing to do is wear more unrevealing clothes, but wear a lot of sexy underwear that only he knows you are wearing. And save some real sexy outfits for him when you are at home alone together.

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  • 1 decade ago

    This sounds familiar (my first husband used to do that). I think some people are naturally jealous and others are not. Probably he is the first type and you are the second. At best you can take it as caring, protective behavior and as some kind of compliment, meaning you look nice. Personally, I think that most of the time jealousy causes problems, and even serious ones sometimes.

    Why don't you try for once going out with him looking really horrible. When he asks why, tell him that you thought he didn't want you to look nice, from the way he was behaving the last time. If he doesn't seem to notice, ask him how you look, or get a friend in on the act, and get her to tell you in front of him something like "No offense, girl. But are you feeling OK? You don't look so good." Once he has noticed that you look like crap, then you can have a discussion about it later.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Nothing can ruin a relationship faster than jealously. Jealousy creates anxiety, anger, loneliness, hate, fear. No one thinks clearly when jealous. Jealousy will often change to the non valiant abuse.

    Having a relationship with a jealous person is tough. The jealous person acts entrusting or unworthy. Jealousy makes the person unattractive, even repulsive.

    Jealousy comes about because of the insecurity of the jealous person and the jealousy may or may not have foundation. This person is afraid of hidden communication lines and will do anything to try to uncover them.

    You can help him by assuring him that you chose him for a reason and there is no need for you to be so easily tempted elsewhere. Remind him that he is every bit as deserving as those guys he feel threatened by and much more.

    But most like a counseling will be needed.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    First of all, there is nothing YOU can do to make him modify his behavior. He is the only one capable of changing or suffering the consequences.

    Jealousy is a sign of insecurity, lack of trust and immaturity in the person who so irrationally uses it. All human beings have an innate jealousy/protective gene that operates under very primatively instinctual triggers such as; the threat to one's bloodline, the encroachment of territory, the search for food, the search for mate, etc... Modern man has been so exposed to extremes of social thinking that the jealousy in the 'hard drive' is no longer simple. It becomes a magnification of one's own fears and manifests itself through rage, stalkings, verbal and emotional abuse, control, manipulation, blackmail,and worse.

    A true man feels exremely PROUD to have a woman at his side that makes other poor suckers just turn and fantisize! Knowing that I am the object of envy is enough to allow my spouse to project whatever image suits her!

    Nothing makes us feel better than to know that we can be as natural about sexuality and the way we project it.

    Breaking the mold that has made some of us be unnaturaly jealous is not an easy thing to accomplish. First one must recognize that the pattern of conduct is harming the relationship. Then you have to devise a plan to correct the situation, followed by a disciplined regimen of adhearance to the plan. You must practice until the old patterns are substituted by healthier, more logical, more fun standards.

    Talk to you spouse and expose to him the points of view here expressed and start to establish open dialog about your concerns.

    I wish you the best!

    Rey

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  • Carlos
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    You can 1-dress down for him ( really ) so even he won´t be comfortable, so people will stare at you for the wrong reason.2- Have someone he admires or trusts his/her opinion ( but he thinks you are not close to ) incidentally talk ( in a general way ) about how people perceive a jealous person to be insecure, immature and maybe it will dawn on him that is what he is perceived to be like. 3- start being jealous of him in the same manner he is of you so he will feel himself what it is like to be subjected to that, complain if he dresses up have him dress the way he would like you to dress. Talking and explaining only go so far.

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  • 1 decade ago

    The way I see it is, you have two choices....either stop wearing these type clothes when you go out, or accept the fact that he is going to be jealous when you do. He has the problem , not you, but his problem becomes your problem when he gets mad. At least for the time being, probably the best thing to do, is to dress more conservatively.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    even though what your husband is doing is a sign of immaturity... ey if you love him and if you want your amrriage to work..sarifice your sexy clothes and dress up as he wanted.. after all you are together as one.. there are some clothes which are not that sexy but...looks sexy.. you know what i mean ryt...if you feel that your sexy even with "old fashin clothes" you will looked sexy at the eyes of other people....

    after all marriage and love is a matter of sacrificing things... and always remind or tell your husband the you love him and always give assurance to him... to avoid such jealous acts of him... Goodluck and God blesss

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    U can't change him.It seems u r beautiful.I had similar problem but time is the best medicine. He will become normal after few years.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    i love for my wife to dress up nice and even like when i notice other people looking or giving complements....... makes me remember my marriage is something i have towork at and if other people didn't notice her maybe iwould forget how hot she is.

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  • 1 decade ago

    if you gave him only once that pleasure to be the one who decides what you are going to wear, you already looed the beatle.

    If you want to be yourself don't let anyone decides anything for you

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