Do relatives actually know about someones orientation without being told?

Parents, aunts, uncles, cousins, siblings, etc. Are they just in denial themselves about their loved ones sexuality? Do they keep quiet out of respect? Is it an age thing where the person is not married yet and then they start to suspect? What are your thoughts?

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Believe or not, they often do. Sometimes its just too difficult to vocalize their thoughts, intuitions or speculations. A lot is based upon fear, rejections, not knowing how to deal with the situations. Others know, and want to reach out; but find it a challenge to overcome. Trust me, my family knew and with great pain, reverted from addressing the issue; even after I vocalized by sexual feelings and likes. In as much, family members, who are accepting are your most trusted allies. They can bridge the gap; that most people need on both sides of the fence.

  • 4 years ago

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  • 1 decade ago

    It really depends on the familial situation. If you're close to the people, they will begin to sense certain things.... like why Mary/Billy doesn't have a significant other?? It certainly is sometimes an age thing . In certain cultures, though, people don't move out of their parents' home unlit they're married . Personally, in my case, EVERYONE knew . Probably way before I did!!!! That's because a lot of diff people in my family have been exposed to out gays before I came out, and that made it easier.

  • 1 decade ago

    I think they sometimes suspect waaaaaay before marriage would become an issue and just don't want to deal with it. They hope it will go away like the bad hairdos and sudden crying jags did.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Let's face it, a lot of gay people fit into the stereotype, and children have no idea about what's "right", "wrong" or socially accepted. And family puts two and two together.

    But denial is strong, so you can even get married and no one will say a word!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Some people have a good gaydar, and of course your family would have the best because they are around you the most. They know your thoughts and feeings on things and Im sure they could tell if you were.

  • 1 decade ago

    I can't speak for anyone but mom's. I am very intuitive to my daughters. I always know when something is wrong, or something is bothering them. I know when they don't feel good, or when they are really happy. I devoted myself to them and their best interests all their 23yrs and I'm usually right on target about what is going on in their lives.

    However, I was completely shocked when one of my daughters told me she was bisexual. It just never occurred to me, and both her father and I are bisexuals.

    So really, I think most moms do, but not all of us think about their kids sexuality. It never made any difference to me.

  • 1 decade ago

    Hopefully it is because they are your family and just love you. They are trying thier hardest to just accept something that you probably offended that they feel the need to accept. It's just finding out someone is not who you thought they were is hard. Why worry about it if they aren't saying anything to you about it. They obviously aren't that worried.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I don't think a relative can ever actually know, but I do think they can suspect one is gay.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    sure most of them suspect it..but they also realize that it's really none of their business until they are told by the person.

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