"spare the rod, spoil the child" Is this true?
The old testement in the Christian bible says, "spare the rod, spoil the child". When I question and suggest other ways to discipline children besides striking them, most US people will say that they were "spanked" or "whipped" when young and were uneffected, and it made them healthier adults. Is there a correllation between corporal punishment and a reduction in problem behaviour? Some research conducted in US jails and penitentiary's show that 85% of inmates were not "spared the rod" as described in the Christian bible. Is there a loving tactful way one can beat their children?
Oh Jesus, save me!! Take me home NOW!
- Anonymous1 decade agoFavorite Answer
- sparkletinaLv 61 decade ago
There is a huge difference between spanking and abusing. The penitentiary research is skewed unless they also ask the same number of never incarcerated people. You could say that 95% of inmates were raised on Mother's milk. You set up rules and guidelines for your children. And they will always push to see just how much they can get away with. If the punishment is sitting in a corner or having Mommy talk to you, big deal. If the punishment involves a bit a pain, the child will think twice about breaking the rules next time. I think you could probably do a study and see that moral decay, violence in schools, disruptive classroom behavior and so on all became an increasing problem after the mahogany was removed from the Principal's office.
- AbrielLv 51 decade ago
There is a right way and a wrong way to spank a kid. Pro-corporeal punishment childcare experts basically recommend:
--don't administer the spanking when angry
--before spanking the child, explain to them why they are getting the spanking and make sure they understand why they deserve it
--don't use objects
--hit only the buttocks, nowhere else
--after the spanking is done, repeat why they got the spanking and make sure the child understands and apologizes for their behavior
I don't believe in the "spare the rod" crap. Every single child I have seen who had parents go by that philsophy has been a spoiled, selfish, misbehaving, disrespectful brat. Time-outs generally only work for older children...young children have no concept of time and if you put them in a time-out they'll forget why they are in time-out 5 seconds after you put them there. The only thing they understand is quick and immediate discipline. Wailing on the kid to the point of leaving bruises is one thing, but one or two smacks on the bottom isn't going to hurt them. It'll shock them more than anything.
- MamaBearLv 61 decade ago
I don't believe that quote is correct. The verse you are trying to disprove actually says "He who spares the rod hates his son."
This is by no means a blanket endorsement for beating one's children black and blue. That is a misconception! It is simply part of a larger idea called "DISCIPLINING YOUR CHILDREN". As any child psychology expert will tell you, a child who grows up without any discipline at all is heading for disaster.
It is possible to give your children PHYSICAL DISCIPLINE, as in NEGATIVE REINFORCEMENT (spanking, etc.) without BEATING THEM HALF TO DEATH.
To suggest otherwise is completely ignorant!
Your research (85% of inmates...) seems lopsided. Surely something more than how their parents disciplined them (or not) led them to make their bad decisions? Are human beings really that one sided? You failed to mention if the inmates were raised in "loving, Christian" homes, or were the offspring of crack whores. Wouldn't that make a difference? How about individual choices, regardless of how they were raised? Your information is skewed. Bad science.
"Is there a loving, tactful way one can beat their children?" No. A beating is a beating. Not all corporeal punishments qualify as beatings. Learn the difference, or remain ignorant!
Is there a loving, tactful way one can DISCIPLINE their children?
Absolutely.Source(s): Personal experience. I have been spanked, and I have been beaten, so I know the difference!
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- Anonymous1 decade ago
An endorsement of severe corporal punishment.
- 1 decade ago
I believe do that if you "spare the rod, you spoil the child" the fact of the matter is, when i got whipped, i knew it was because i did something wrong, i was corrected and punished. but i knew it was out of love. and i think that is the problem, there is an actual difference between whipping and beating your children. and some people need to learn that.Source(s): God is love, and if you not doing it out of love it's not of God
- arvecarLv 41 decade ago
Sparing the rod, as I see it, simply means not disciplining your child and letting them get away with anything, not giving a child any sort of punishment DOES spoil them and they grow up thinking they can do anything they want and not get in trouble. There are times when raising children that you need to hit them, but you don't have to beat them. Like when they hit a younger brother or sister, you might want to hit them to show them what it feels like, so they won't do it again. It's all about getting their attention, not about bruising them.Source(s): Five kids, and two grandkids.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Giving your child a decent whack on the bottom is not considered beating, unless you're a complete imbecile.
There is nothing wrong with spanking. My Brother and I were spanked as children and I can tell you, it works. Very well.
The problem is some parents go too far and start using things to hit their kids with instead of their hands, or they'll hit them in the face. That's going too far and it's wrong.
- PeaceLv 71 decade ago
i have never spanked my children nor was i as a child
we have discipline though and my voice is enough
my children know when they have over stepped the mark as i knew with my mum
if being spanked hasn't affected people .. why are we seeing so much horror in the world
there are other more effective ways to discipline
but the best way i have found , is to praise the good actions . promote good in the child instead of focusing on the bad
they will love the attention from the good and be less likely to be bad .. as the attention isn't there
- Granny 1Lv 71 decade ago
There a big difference between smacking and a spat, sometimes a spat is necessary as the last straw, and when nothing works, I have seen a time out work wonders.
- QEDLv 51 decade ago
Actually, the bible never says that. It does say not to spare the rod though.
It's a urban legend that that's in the bible, but most Christians haven't read it so they wouldn't know.