In China, there is Chinese and foreigners.
You are not one of them and never will be.
That is just the way it is.
I have studied China for years now and visited several times.
I am sad to say that I believe it is a rare Asian that will accept a white person.
But, on the other hand, Asians can turn on each other in ways that we would never find acceptable and still be friends.
I would love to hear honest, Asian comments.
You might benefit from studying Confucianism if you are really interested. East and West developed very differently and these differences do not have to develop into hate. But, for both, it is very difficult to mesh the two perspectives.