How can I get him to tell me that he has cheated?

Question

It's been a year and a half when I think it took place but every time I mention it he says it's all in my head but it's this feeling I get. You know when you get this feeling about something and it just won't let go of you, well I feel this way. It's not like it's going to change much except knowing. When I call him a liar he gets really mad and defends her sometimes or if I say something bad about her. I even have dreams about it happening. We have a 4 month old baby together. I need some ideas on how to get him to spit out the truth. Without starting a fight!!

Answer 1

Favorite Answer

You've dealt with this for a year and a half already and he has never come clean about it - chances are he NEVER will. So, either get over it, or cause the big fight to see if the truth comes out. Could it be that it's all in your head?

Answer 2

Tell him that you need him to be upfront and honest with you. Tell him that you cannot move forward with your relationship until you know that he has told you everything. If you are having doubts about him telling you the truth, usually your right. Do not attack him. He will not open up to you. Tell him that you have to know and you are not going to judge or attack him for telling you. If he does end up telling you the truth, tell him you appreciate the fact he was honest and that you want him to be honest with you all the time. Hopefully, you can work through this and raise your child together. However, if you are constantly arguing and there is no trust, it might be better to separate and move on.

Answer 3

Even if he tell you the "truth" it will start a fight, won't it? What do you want out of this? To break up or work it out? I think that the more you ask him the more he will deny it and get defensive about it.

Answer 4

Invite her over for a visit, rig the room with a sensitive recorder, maybe vidio/audio, then excuse yourself for awhile to go outside and then at the end of the day review the video to examine it for incriminating evidence, then if it's there, file for divorce, move out of state, leave them to have each other, mission accomplished. You can walk away knowing that finally you outsmarted them, without an argument.

Answer 5

He will never tell you that he cheated. He'll make you believe that it is all in your head. Trust your women's intuition. Start asking him questions about it and if his stories differs you got your answer. He cheated. They never remember.

Answer 6

Why don't you believe him. Trust is the foundation of any relationship. If you don't have trust the relationship is doomed to failure. If he says it didn't happen and you trust him then let it go.

Answer 7

trust your instinct, his defensiveness is his cover.

Answer 8

get him drunk he'll talk