At wat age is it appropriate to start kicking your grown children out of the house?

My mother is sitting right beside me and would really like to know.

I'm 21 and in my last year of college, i have 2 brothers that also live with us who are 24, and 20 neither go to school but they both have jobs. There is 5 of us in total and a new granddaughter, who happens to live close bye, and mom gets stuck with babysitting, ALL the time. Any thoughts to set my moms mind at ease?

(Also she is a divorced single mother who put her life on hold for us 11 years ago)

11 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    I would say after college graduation, and a full time job is found that parents should expect their children to become self sufficient. If there is no college involved then 20 should be the limit because they are old enough to hold full time employment and pay for their own place to live. the longer they live at home the more dependant they become on their parents.

    Source(s): my mom bailed my little bro out of everything and he is now not responsible at all. In fact my mother has custody of my brothers son. because he can't take care of him himself
  • Chris
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    Becoming a responsible adult is difficult. People will be ready to live independently at different ages because people mature at different ages. The 24 year old and the 20 year old are working. Do they contribute to the household expenses? Do they keep respectable hours and respect your mother? If so, and your mother is comfortable with them living at home, I think there is nothing wrong with that. It takes time to save enough income to get an apartment. The ideal is to have the first months rent and security plus at least 2 month's extra rent in the bank. If that is an immediate goal, your mom should help them with that by charging them a reasonable percentage of their income while they stay with her. Many adults leave home unprepared and just end up coming back.

    As for the new granddaughter, your mother needs to assert herself. She has raised her children and if she doesn't want to babysit, she should just say no.

  • 1 decade ago

    Kids of age 24 and under can be claimed as depends on the income tax, which suggests that just because they reached legal adult age they become independent.

    Parenting is never-ending. Hopefully the older kids can help out mom around the house after school, so mom has to concentrate just on working. Also, there's nothing wrong with getting a part-time job while going to school.

  • 1 decade ago

    My oldest son moved out at 20 because he wanted to.It didn't work out with a roommate so he found his own place.He makes really good money but was paying about 600.00 a month for basically sleeping there.To me that is a huge waste of money.I invited him back home and charged him 250.00 a month for his share and told him I didn't care what his room looked like but to keep his stuff out of my way.He cooked for himself and did his own laundry something he'd been doing for a long time anyway.This last time lasted for about a year and a half.Then we had a heart to heart and decided he should try to move out again.He found an awesome roommate and is only 3 blocks from me so I see him regularly.It sounds like your mom has done her job now you all need to help her out if you are living there.Those who have jobs should be helping out financially and helping around the house.And you only get stuck babysitting if you just aren't able to say no.Nobody can take advantage of you if you don't let them.Personally,it took me years to learn to say no to people because I was so afraid of offending someone.But then I'd be mad at getting stuck doing something I didn't want to do.Are you even getting paid for babysitting?Your time is valuable too and shame on the person using you even if it is family.I'm sure they could pay you something.And good for the the person writing in for your mom.It sounds like you'd really like to help.But it does have to start with your mom.Be strong.In the long run,even if your kids are mad for you standing up for yourself,they love you and need you for more than just a place to stay.

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  • 1 decade ago

    I don ot understand why your mom would want to kick your brothers out if they both work and contribute to the household.

    Now if they were being lazy bums and did not work then I would be kicking them out at 18.

    As far as babysitting goes perhaps your mother should talk to the mother or father whichever one is your mom child and tell him or her that she does nto want to babysit all the time and look into daycare.

    It is never right to dump your baby onto someone else.

  • 1 decade ago

    As long as everyone is pitching in and paying rent, I dont see a problem, but as soon as things start to go south, she needs to step up say its time for you to grow up. I am a 20 y/o who moved out on my own two years ago into my own house, at some point you just have to take the diapers off.

  • 1 decade ago

    I think you kids really need to get out of the house, for your own good. And she needs to kick you out if you won't leave, she has done her job and sounds like she did it well, she deserves to have some alone time. You guys are more than old enough to start your own life.

  • 1 decade ago

    If I was your mother I would have kicked all of you out as soon as it was legal. All of you are too lazy to stand up on your own feet and are totally dependant on your mother. Pack up and get out.

    She should say "no" to babysitting, she did her share.

    Something tells me you are not going to let her see this. It may smarten her up.

  • 1 decade ago

    let the one who is in skool stay becuz he is going somewhere in life. Kick the other 2 out they have money foe an apartment

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    i think 20 but thats only my opinion

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