bad crush, cant get rid of it. any advise?

I need some help. I have/had a crush on this guy (my old boss, we dont work together anymore but keep in touch sometimes) for years while we worked together. But I never did anything about it because he was married long before I met him. And I would not to try to get a guy who's married. Anyways, there is and always has been a really strong attraction between us, there is no denying it and I am pretty darn sure he felt the same way about me as I felt about him (signs). Well over the years I fought this off and I got married and have a great marriage and beautiful baby. But, every once in a while he will call or email (innocently, we have always had a respect for each other and each others relationship) and everytime I talk to him, or have a dream about him or something, all those feelings come back. I hate it and I want to be rid of it, but I dont want to just stop talking to him completely because I would always miss him. He's a wonderful person that I dont want to not know.

3 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    It's about the "one that got away". I was happily married with a child too and still got a thrill everytime I talked to my ex, which wasn't often. It made me feel guilty and ashamed, but it is very natural. You never really had a thing with him so you always wonder. Concentrate on your husband's qualities; this other man may have a lot of faults that you just don't know about. You have turned him into a superman in your mind; he isn't, believe me. You and your husband chose one another for a reason, he chose his wife. The best thing you can do for yourself (and him) is to stop communicating. It won't be easy, but I think you'll be glad you did. Good luck. Start thinking like a mother now. What is best for your child? Happily married parents!

    Source(s): My husband and I divorced after 12 years of marriage. I had no contact with my ex for the last 7 or 8 of my marriage, but we started talking again when we were both divorced. We did get together once, it was fun, but no fireworks.
  • 1 decade ago

    There will always be other people you meet that u will be attracted too. As long as you dont act on it you will be fine! i think alot of it is you wonder what it would be like with him. You cant have him cuz he is married so that just makes u want him more. Stay friends with him-e mail with him- a little harmless flirting is ok! But dont do anything to risk the real and wonderful marriage you have! Good luck

  • move on... leave ur past behind...just cut off all ties..gradually... nothing is worth ...think of ur baby... u say u have a good marriage and a good kid.. focus on those... ask if this little crush is worth anything??

    well.. if u can live with ur head and ur heart...with it not comming into ur life..have a bit of fun

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