Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 decade ago

How do I know if my 15 yr old son is gay?

32 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    ask him.. tell him its ok with you and you just want to know.... if hes affraid to tell you its only because hes affraid you will not accept it.

  • 1 decade ago

    Depends on your relationship.

    If you're strict, and always have been.. if a lot of people out there would describe you as a bit too "over the edge" - then you'll probably never know, and the best thing to do is just to take a drink (do NOT get drunk) and one day when he's next to you just do the little white lie "The other day I was watching this show on the discovery channel and they were saying a lot of kids your age are gay, and that's weird 'cause in when I was a kid that was never even heard of."

    Then watch his response. If he blows you off then be blunt: what? are YOU gay? they always said people tried to blow off the topic! - then he'll say yes/no, if he says yes just say "Oh, well ok." and walk away. If he says no, then just laugh and say "Well then I guess I ought to buy you a playboy."

    Or you can be sneaky and search his room or computer.

    Seriously, the less paranoia you have in life and the more acceptance you have the easier it will go for you. That, and you don't want him to go through life thinking you'd hate him if he told you the truth - 'cause once he's out the door he'll avoid you like the plague.

  • 1 decade ago

    I agree, just ask. Maybe something like, "Do you think you could be gay?". Sexuality can be very confusing at that age and he may not be able to give a yes or no answer.

    A big clarifier is what a person fantasizes about. If it is mainly guys, well, there is the answer. People sometimes try to define sexual orientation by behavior but sexual orientation is defined by what a person is attracted to, inside, not what gender of person they have dated or had sex with.

    Plenty of gay guys marry and have kids and label themselves "straight". Plenty of straight guys have sex with other guys, at some point, even though their real attraction is to women....

    And yes, above all, make it clear you just love HIM, regardless of which gender he is attracted to. Even if he turns out to be straight, he will always remember you love him unconditionally.

    If you are really stumped on how to start the conversation, maybe print out some of these responses and see what he thinks =] Writing a letter can help get things down that might be difficult to discuss, otherwise.

    Check out PFLAG, too:

    http://www.pflag.org/

  • YD
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    I think that is your asking this question you probably already know if your son is or isn't gay you should not treat him any differently nor should you be disappointed accept him the way that he is and offer him the love and support a mother gives her child, he's got enough to deal with in the world so don't tum against him the best thing to do is talk to him about it and seek counseling a third person will be able to help your family through this.

    Good luck!

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    You will know if your 15 yr. son is gay because he will start bringing all guy friends over and all of them will be a little to bit on the happy side.

  • 1 decade ago

    Before doing/asking anything prepare yourself for a yes or a no answer. When you are sure you can handle to truth, then ask him. To get an honest answer from him you might want to preface the conversation with something reassuring. You may even want to start placing hints around the house, or making positive comments about people you know that are gay, to create an accepting environment for him to talk in. Then go ahead and ask.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    A pretty good sign, is if he is bufuing his best (guy) friend. Just kidding, had to say that.

    You need to sit him down, and say "son, I will love you no matter how you answer this question, but are you doing the backdoor action on guys?

  • 1 decade ago

    he only hangs out with guys and only guys call the house for him.Try to hook him up with a girl and see if he is interested in her.Take your son to the beach and see if he is checking the girlss or the guys out.good luck what ever you find out still love him the same.

  • 1 decade ago

    Sometimes we believe we know our children, but we really don't. I always tell my daughter that there's nothing she can't tell me. Tell your son the same thing, and put a lot of emphasis on the word "nothing".

  • 1 decade ago

    You don't. At fifteen, he may not know either. I wondered it at 15, and I'm straight. Who cares. Love him anyways and give him the room to figure things out for himself.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    If he brings home his boyfriend thats a good sign that he is probably gay

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