- 1 decade agoFavorite Answer
0. A woman reported the disappearance of her husband to the police.
The officer looked at the man's photograph, questioned the wife, and then asked if she wanted to give her husband any message if they found him.
'Yes, please' she replied. 'Tell him Mother didn't come after all.'
1. An elephant is drinking out of a river when he spots a turtle asleep on a log. The elephant ambles over and kicks the unsuspecting turtle clear across the river. "Why did you do that?" asks a passing giraffe.
"Because I recognized it as the same turtle that took a nip out of my trunk 47 years ago."
"Wow, what a memory!" says the giraffe.
"Yes," says the elephant. "Turtle recall."
2. An FAA inspector goes to check out Santa. They meet, and Santa shows him the fully loaded sleigh. The inspector checks out the equipment, the load balance, etc. "Everything's looking good, Mr. Claus, so it's time we move on to the flight test."
They board the sleigh. "Why are you carrying a shotgun?," asks Santa.
The FAA inspector replies, "In this test, you're going to lose an engine on take off.
2006-04-26 09:27:35 補充：
2006-04-26 09:28:09 補充：
- Anonymous7 years ago
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- 1 decade ago
Smart man+ smart woman=romance
Smart man+ dumb woman=affair
Dumb man+ smart woman=marriage
Dumb man+ dumb woman=pregnancy
Smart boss+ smart employee=profit
Smart boss+ dumb employee=production
Dumb boss+ smart employee=promotion
Dumb boss+ dumb employee
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need
GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a hushabd
A man never worries about the future untill he gets a wife
A successful man is one who makes nore money than his wife can spend
A successful woman is one who can find such a man
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die
PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't
Man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does
A woman has the last word in any argument
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument