There was a time in my life when I lived as everyone else with the typical dream of good job, good wife, and fine children. When events in 1996 ruined my life, the only thing I had left to live for was my knowledge, some of which I've related through my online essays.
As a government-award-winning lifeling grunge-hippie rabble-rouser, I never expected to live that long anyways. Even today, I don't want to live to be old. I understand that I make enemies of the creeps in the world with my writings, but I'd much rather die execution style for my beliefs than of old age in obscurity. I'm no longer afraid of death, just the means thereof.
I would rather help educate people to the evils in the world and the technologies in develpment today that will soon allow us to live forever in a computer network than contemplate forcing a new human life into this world.
These days I find it hard to fathom what drives the average person other than maintaining a comfort level. If it's not in their backyard, they don't seem to care. They choose not to see the bigger picture of real life. The "bread and circuses" analogy comes quickly to mind when I think on it.
Governments are corrupt. Families and institutions are corrupt. Schoolchildren are being dumbed down generation after generation, and today more than 25% of u.s. children are sexually abused. Facts regarding 9/11 that make the official version impossible are ignored which has lead to more than one war. Our leaders are making money hand over fist investing in their war.
If you want to look back and think you did good, become a mentor. Teach kids critical thinking, not just to follow orders. Educate them to the evils in the world so that they may take steps to prevent history from repeating itself.
I can't tell you how good it feels when I discover a college course using one of my essays, or a presidious organization requesting to republish some of my works. Despite not being able to finish college, the drive they instill to publish or perish stuck with me. And with today's Internet, becoming a source of information is simple. The time and effort I put into a paper online can quickly spread to so many others.
There are so many ways to help people. From working with children to assisting the disabled, volunteerism is availble to those who would reach out a helping hand. Just use your talents the best way you can. When you then think back to all the people you've made smile, then you can die happy.