is it wrong if you home-school one child and not the other?

One is easy to deal with acedemically while the other does not listen just plays around. nothing seems to get his attention, so i figure why not send him to school. Do you think I am being unfair to him? Or is it that I know my child and I know what is best for them. Desperatly need feedback on this.

7 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    does your home-school-able kid feel that's unfair? if he does, than it is. it doesn't matter how the troubled one feels because he has it good. sending the troubled one to school may be a bad idea if no one can control him. it may be harder because the teachers outside have limited powers in discipline. in the end they will say "do you want me to tell your mom?" and if he feels that you are no much of a threat than you'd just be back where you've started. on top of that, troubled kids at school may REINFORCE bad behavior. so chances are, you may still need to find a way to control him.

    what got me following the rules is the "family shame" pressure. i'm constantly reminded that if i mess up outside of the house, it would reflect negatively on the family. so being pushed outsided got me listening. it's actually a double edged sword, so i wouldn't try it.

  • 1 decade ago

    It is not wrong to meet your children's needs according to your best judgment, that's your job as a parent.

    You say that one is easy to deal with "academically" and this has me suggest that you might take a deeper look at what you consider to be educational about the activities you are expecting your children to participate in. Because children have different dispositions, personalities and learning needs you may need to be more flexible to accommodate them.

    Many schools are notoriously inflexible about being able to accommodate the needs of challenging kids, whereas some schools or specific teachers are really great at discovering what will engage children with different learning needs.

    So, the real question is who has the flexibility to meet your child's needs, you or the school? No matter which path you choose you should monitor the results and make sure that your child gets what he needs. If it's not working then try to learn more and adjust again.

  • 1 decade ago

    No, it's not wrong. Every child is different.

    Just watch how your child reacts to school -- is he more withdrawn? Does he seem more active? Things like that.

    Some kids need the peer pressure and peer leaders in order to settle down and study. Other kids do fine on their own. I think second children, in particular, are more likely to look toward other children for leadership. Oldest children are more likely to look to Mom and Dad.

    Why not give it a try? You can always go back to homeschooling. Or you can try a combination of school and homeschooling, which I think every parent should try.

    I teach at Japanese elementary schools, and I have homeschooled in English. But I'm very satisfied with Japanese elementary education over all -- lots of good art and music programs, and also great social development curriculum (at least in the small schools).

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    That's what I did for one of my kids and I don't think it's unfair. My child who I sent to school is doing better then she did when he was home schooled.

    She graduated from public school and now attending college.

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  • 1 decade ago

    I took my son out of school because he has had some problems with his teachers not listening to me, and he is very hyper.... It would be a great opportunity to homeschool that child and it will make a difference.... But, no, i have 2 girls that are in highschool and they go to school everyday, but their brother gets homeschooled.

  • alas
    Lv 4
    3 years ago

    i comprehend various people who have not homeschooled all their infants--some at school, some at homestead. there is not any longer something incorrect with it. you haven't any longer given a lot advice in this newborn this is inflicting you issues. -How previous is he? If he interior reason youthful, he might no longer be developmentally waiting, even in the journey that your different newborn grow to be at that age. -Has he already been at school? grow to be he like this at school? if so, then sending him decrease back might no longer be going to restoration something, different than provide you some area-time alleviation. inspite of the place he does his training, looking parenting books with a thank you to attend to issues like this may well be efficient. -What suggestions-set have you ever keen approximately him? possibly the variety you're utilising purely isn't what he desires. -Are there underlying matters? -is this a newborn who purely would not pay attention to you generally? Do you have a strained dating with him? interpreting parenting books might desire to help. it particularly is hard to declare in case you're doing this by way of fact you comprehend what's best for him or once you're purely desirous to do it out of frustration. the difficulty is, each and every from time to time teenagers show us that we gained't pass approximately changing them yet that we might desire to alter ourselves to realize them. you comprehend your self best, you comprehend what you have tried, you comprehend your son extra effective than we do and you comprehend no count in case you're keen and in a position to do extra to realize him. in case you have examine and researched and particularly tried each and every little thing and purely experience that he'd be extra effective off with a diverse instructor, then do it.

  • 1 decade ago

    no way. If that kid needs public school, LET THE KID GO. You arn't being unfair to him at all.

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