yes to all your questions. You should have all the same values or at least most of them you should share. Religion is a biggy. If your from different faiths, you may have problems. But opposites do attract! and if thats the case in a marriage you really have top come to common ground on a lot of issues. I'm very social, by husband not. I got out he stays home. I like to dance he hates it, and well he really can't. So I dance (like at weddings) fast song with other people but slow songs with only him. Kids? we wanted kids, but I only wanted two. He agreed since I was the one who had to be pregnant. He likes to spoil them, I don't - we used to fight about it a lot, not anymore. Except at xmas. I think 3 to5 gifts is plenty, He thing 10 it the magic number but ends up buy like 15 for each of them. If he wants to buy baby girl an expensive git, I go buy baby boy an expensive gift. It all washes out in the end. We must go out of town alone without the kids at least once a year, for the sake of our marriage. Because if not you forget why your together. I work 12 hour shifts, I don't like to cook after working 12 hrs, so gets take out, when I'm off I cook. He likes me to scratch his back (gently) to help him sleep, I like to go for professional massages, because he doesn't like to take the time. This hurts my feelings and he will if he knows I'm upset, but it's like once a month for him and nightly for me. When he complains about the money I spend, I tell him, " then I'll quit my job that provides meidcal insurance and almost $20.00 an hr and then you can comeplain about the money I spend." He then says, " no, you can't do that." I tell him,"then hush, because I work long hours, half the year at night which takes time away from our kids and I deserve what little I spend." And he always, tells me I'm right.