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ryanstotler02

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  • Girlfriend sleeping with other guy?

    My girlfriend has known a guy for about 5 weeks, he is about 8 years older than us (not that it matters). They started out as friends, supposedly. Now she is really into him and they have had sex several times. The first time she opened up and told me about it. Now she's really hush hush about it. Acts like it never happened, even though I know it did because I have read their texts talking about it. She had cheated on me previously with another guy, which I was pissed about. But when she told me about the first time with this guy I hardly even reacted, I just said it was ok. I would love her no matter what and would always care about her. He comes over every day now and he talks to me a little bit and overall is friendly with me and we have a few interests from talking to him. He talks to my son and reads him books and they take him places together. They have only known each other about 5 weeks though, that's the thing. My girlfriend tells me she is confused and really emotional right now and really loves me, but that she also loves him a lot as well. She says she doesn't want to have to let either one of us go. I just reassure her that I will always love her, because my feelings really are never going to change regardless. We have a son together and have been together for 8 years. I ignored a lot of her concerns while we were together and feel like I drove her away. I blew off all of her pleas, but have really been working on changing, if not for her, for my son. I have a short temper, always have, I saw my dad with one for years and can only assume I get my emotions from him in that regard. I never listened to her, I always had an opinion and that is something that I have tried to work on as well. She tells us both that she loves us and she still shows me affection when he isn't around and shows him affection when I am not around. She actually had sex with me today before I left for work, so I am kind of confused. She has the philosophy that sex is for enjoyment and that our brains are wired that way, it's science. I believe her, because I have seen science prove it. I guess my question is, is my family doomed? Will we ever be a family again without a third wheel? I am basically thinking at this point that this is more lust than love on her part and that there is nothing honestly there, she just perceives it that way because she was lacking something in our relationship and this other guy offers what I didn't as far as certain things are concerned. She told me that some things I am a lot better with than he is, but he offers the emotional support and comfort she needs and that she wants the best of both of us. Finally tonight, I just basically let go and told her I knew she was having sex and just didn't really care at all. It didn't bother me at all and just to be honest with me. Does anyone else perceive this guys entrance into our relationship as puppy love on their parts or is this something that will just tear us apart permanently? I guess my problem is that I see and hear what they say and it is so deep and heartfelt like they have been in love forever, but the short time period kind of intrudes on me having any belief that it's real in any way.

    14 AnswersSingles & Dating10 years ago
  • Lost my girlfriend, what to do?

    We have been together 8 years and have a 2 1/2 year old son together. She has been trying to help this alcoholic guy friend that she has sober up for three or four weeks now. He went 11 days sober and relapsed last night and she was mad at him. So she went over this morning to tell him how mad she was and was supposed to come back so we could go to the store and get some laundry done together. After waiting 4 hours, she said she was bringing him home, he has been a very sore subject for me since my son and I have become second string to this guy. I had to take my son when she got home with him and take him to her brother's to stay for a while and then come back. This whole time she has been telling me that this was nothing bit a friendship and I was over thinking it. So, I decided to find out for myself, I put our camcorder in a place where it wasn't visible, but where it could see and hear them while I was gone. During their convo while I was gone she was rubbing his hair and she was talking about me and said I was a coward and probably wouldn't come back. She also told him that despite what he did last night and the fact that she was very upset with him, that she loved him and couldn't turn it off. I spent the entire day with them here, we watched some tv, smoked and talked and the guy seems like he has a lot of things he shares with me similarity-wise. I have no beef with him, except the fact that he's allowing it to go too far himself, which is disrespectful to me. I brought my son home later and the whole night he wanted the guy to read him books, play Wii with him and my son even kissed him because he had an injury. After this day, my girlfriend almost tried to get him to spend the night, but said she thought I wouldn't be comfortable with it and told him no. She then proceeded to take him home about 9 pm and it's been a while since she's been gone. I feel like I have lost my reason for waking up tomorrow and really would just like to swallow some pills and go away so my son and my girlfriend (ex?) can be happy without me......

    2 AnswersMental Health10 years ago
  • Is this over the top or am I making too much out of it?

    My girlfriend has a new guy friend that she met through her mom. They have known each other for about a year, but really haven't started hanging out until 4 weeks ago. Since then he calls every single day, sometimes two or three times. They talk about an hour each time. Some days to add onto that they text each other for close to an hour as well. Today she went to his house at 8 in the morning and while she answered some of my texts early on, later on she stopped answering period. Claiming her phone was in the house (he lives on his dad's property in a motor home but occasionally they go in the house to talk). She waited until it was time for me to leave for work (2:30) to get home. Then she texted with him after I left the house (he texted her first) for two hours. Then when my son fell asleep she called and talked to him for over an hour again. He has been using his dad's phone and his dad refuses to add a line for him, so my girlfriend agreed to add a line to our plan for him to use. Does any of this seem inappropriate to anyone else? Or is it just me? Does it seem a bit excessive to talk to any friend that much at the sake of the one you are with? Is it a bit odd that we are adding a phone line for him to our plan (he is paying for it himself)? Give me some advice here. (We have been together 8 years and have a 2 year old son together. Neither one of us has really had much of a social life while together. She cheated on me with a guy in 2007 for about 5 months and then we reconciled. I have also been promiscuous once with some women I met online, nothing physical, but talking inappropriately. We also have addressed this, it was over a year ago now.)

    2 AnswersOther - Family & Relationships10 years ago
  • What should I do for our 7 year anniversary?

    Some background info: My fiance and will be together 7 years on January 16th. We met in college the first year and are still in love to this day. We have a beautiful 18 month old son together and are still yet to be married, basically because she agreed we would when we were finally set in life. I would really like to get married this year and knowing the two of us, it's very important our little guy be with us whatever our anniversary plans might entail. Does anyone know of some places that are somewhat family friendly while still being romantic? I keep drawing a blank. I know she mentioned wanting to see the Atlantic Ocean, since she's never been there. Is there an area that we could get married while we were close to the ocean and have a romantic two day getaway that would be somewhat family friendly? Please, all ideas are welcome.

    3 AnswersMarriage & Divorce1 decade ago
  • What ingredients should I add to make this sauce better?

    I have a Sundried Tomato and Basil Alfredo sauce, I was wondering if adding chicken or mushrooms or both might be a good idea to add to this sauce to make it a little better. Also, if chicken is a good idea, what kind of chicken should I get from the store to add to it? If there are other ingredients that might add to the good taste of this sauce, what might they be? My girlfriend likes fettucini alfredo and she likes this sauce, but I would like to make something special for her for dinner. I just wondered if anyone had any recommendations....thank you for your time.

    10 AnswersCooking & Recipes1 decade ago